My Hick Life…

Truly sad, I tell you. I learned to edge my lawn today. I never thought it come to this, but yes, I edged my lawn to perfection, God damn it! I used a powerful Black & Decker edger that caught the eye of some of my hick neighbors who were also tolling away in their robot lives w/ de-weeding, lawn mowing, & random garden upgrades. One guy even came over and checked out my edger. I won’t go into our exciting conversation. Anyway, now all I need to do is buy a Ford F150, get one of those lame wood carriages that look like they’re about to come off of trucks and hit other cars on the freeway (you people in cities probably have no clue what I’m talking about), buy a hardcore lawn mower and lastly, drive around cutting other peoples’ lawn through the guise of my own lawn mowing business.

Ok change of topic… *