The Demands of Love – Leo Tolstoy

Reading the following extract out of Tolstoy’s diary is truly a humbling experience, to say the least. First of all, I learned that I’m a complete hypocrite when it comes to my temperance, generosity, & simple care for those around me. It’s a sad & painful realization, I tell you, but all I can say is that I am doing my best to change for the better.

I was thinking of giving my personal interpretation, but I am going to hold off because I personally hate falling victim to others’ opinions on things I read. It completely skews my ultimate interpretation. To tell you the truth, you need only be a child to comprehend such writing because it is associated with love, the single element of life that is so pure and ubiquitous in our hearts & minds.

Well, one last thing before I let you people skim through this little story. The end result, no matter how you see it, will be a rewarding lifelong experiment that will inevitably begin painfully, only because you must initially expend great energy & time unwinding all that you’ve been taught in order to eventually fall mercy to the demands of love (probably in your old-old age).

[Side note: I’ve searched all over the net for the following extract, but haven’t had luck, so I decided I’d copy it out of one of my books for all 2 of you to enjoy! It’s long, so print it!]

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solomon
solomon

I NEED TO SLOT MY HUMUNGOUS DICK INTO A BLACK PUSSY

A Bastardly Discussion: WHY DOES BASTARDLY COMMENT
A Bastardly Discussion: WHY DOES BASTARDLY COMMENT

[...] Remember, this is all here so that we can waste time @ work, look @ hot women we can never sleep with & of course, make fun of really rich & famous people. So, why must we hate on each other? For those of you needing counseling in the area of love, please read this post. Remember, it’s one thing to be Bastardly, but it’s a whole another thing to be a sick, annoying whorebag of a bastard. [...]

fast
fast

fast

AUTONET009911

car
car

car

AUTONET009911

Vivian Taube
Vivian Taube

Good job, Viv! I rarely get a pat on the back, so I thougth I'd do that.

Love,

me :)

Vivian Taube
Vivian Taube

Well, my system cuts off the left margin, so I had to "guess" at words. I was referred here by Moelicious, who maybe runs the site. I have not read Tolstoy before. This is pretty deep, and "different" from what I expected at this site, considering the title of it.

I used to be more "selfless," myself, I admit. I used to be very devoted to a "saint," rather an avatar, or a woman worshippped as one, globally, who had all sorts of charities that required "menial" tasks, such as cooking and cleaning, and so on. I'd do that for her, because I loved her. Then, when my actual mother got breast cancer, about three years ago--and this woman, Amma is worshipped as an incarnation fo Devi, the divine mother in Hinduism (I'm not Hindu, either, really)--I began to have all sorts of troubles, to the point where I hired a shaman named Lenore Norrgard to help me, earlier this spring. I ended up "giving back" all I bought from Amma over the years, totalling a considerable amount, $3200, especially for someone like me, who is in debt more than I can pay, presently. And I set up an elaborate altar to my "retrieved" soul parts, after she performed a soul retrieval in April, for me--my higher self, so to speak. I had to "reclaim" my divinity from this "spiritual master" I felt was "taking all" from me, and it was "unfair" to me. Plus, her Republican lawyer, Steve Fleisher, harassed me, publicly, for opposing Bush's wars for oil, on retreat in Michigan, the fall Mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. Now, we have Bush again, unfairly, as he "seized" power, the first term, didn't he? And I have come to feel "bitter" about doing "selfless service" for the poor, as it is part of our Constitution that the government should be doing these things. I felt like I was "losing my mind," as an Amma devotee. I have heard she "wants" your anger, to "transform" it, but with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), which I've had for years, it can seem like an "endless stream." One day, about a year ago or so, I woke up and realized this wasn't changing, and I then found this shamanism I've only begun to use, this spring, so I'm still "transforming." That is where I'm at, though. And I've felt "called" to seek enlightenment, as of the moment the first plane struck on September 11th, from my late Uncle Felix's spirit, but no one has really cared but me! I recently had a dream "related" to this, as I sometimes do. That this shamanism and a women's spirituality advanced degree program at the California Institute of Intergral Studies in San Francisco, are two ways for me to "fulfill" this "calling!" I am always looking for ways to do that.

Basement Cross
Basement Cross

[...] 12; Novakeo @ 10:45 pm Came across this Leo Tolstoy piece from his diary posted at excessivly.lame blog. Many a time, I have quoted Leo Tolstoy, a wonderful brilliant writer. When you r [...]

miSs
miSs

Worked! Thanks dude!

Moe
Moe

nah. it's the website. I just made everything on one page, so hopefully that will fix the prob.

miSs
miSs

hey how do i print the whole thing? it keeps printing only the first page? i must be lame, cause i can't figure it out!!

rocket
rocket

forgiveness is a powerful force, and i believe the key to happiness. (and my sanity) that being said , i also have a dutyto take care of myself, and people do have to accept responsibility for their actions... this is called CONSEQUENCES. if someone hurts me, and i let them do it over and over, then i am doing them and me a great dis-service. better to say, you have hurt me, i will not allow this to happen again, this is the change you need to make before i will let you back in to my life... something to that effect anyways. i believe that we are responsible for our own thoughts feelings and actions. if yours are hurting me i need to communicate that to you. i read something once that love is having the will to extend one's self for another's spiritual growth...

Moe
Moe

Just wait till you get the urge to read it again.

Here's my issue...Take for example a friend who has betrayed you horribly: I'm talking comprised your trust, your property, family or money. Would you lend them your time or money and allow them the opportunity to screw you over again? Say you go ahead and trust them again, then they turn around & do the same thing as before. Now what? Your reason for trusting them before was purely selfless trust & based upon the belief that your friend would be different...When the same friend comes around for help again, do you put yourself in the position of being called a hypocrite by not helping or do you walk the plank once more?

We're taught to be aware of such situations from a very young age.

It's very puzzling to me. Just thinking about what I'd do makes me feel selfish for some odd reason, damn it :-). So you pretty much know how I'd react to such a situation....

rocket
rocket

this piece raises many questions in me. very deep and soul searching questions. i have to trust that on some level i am here to help, and that god, or whatever higher power there is, puts into my path those that i am to help. how can i be a force for peace in the world when i can not make peace with my brother or my mother?( or myself) if i give money to the drunk or addict, i am surely not helping, better they hit bottom sooner, then i can be there to help them when they are ready to climb up. something occurs to me, in our suffering there is often great spiritual growth. if i look at my life as a journey, the suffering is meant to be a part of it as much as the joy.... i will be thinking on this through the day.

rocket
rocket

wow, i am going to have to read it again, but that last line says it all doesn't it