The “shit load of smoke” hit.
Before I dive into my update, I want to say that from now these lame updates will no longer feature photos of Angelina Jolie or Paris Hilton, but a photo of a chick(s) hittin’ the sticky stuff! Yes, very disappointing, indeed. I don’t have too many photos, so I’ll probably be falling back on Angelina, Anna K & Paris very soon, so no worries Jackson. Anyway all you brave girls out there, send photos of yourself hittin’ the greens! (Please?)
Ok, moving on…
The superficial news has been pretty lame as of late. I think it might be b/c all the stars are too busy slapping the media with their own political BS so they can prove to the general public that they have money, along with brains. Pretty sad, indeed.
Of course, our favorite hottie feeds the poor, adopts the good-looking & has now turned into an activist. Yes-yes, Angelina is now a nipple activist. How sexy is that?
I still can’t get over that they airbrushed my nipples out of the posters for Lara. Look at that. No nipples. I think it’s rather strange and odd. Nipples are lovely. [contactmusic]
Angelina, we love you. Spank those anti-nipple bastards!
We go from beautiful & free Angelina to an old, wrinkly inmate named Martha Stewart. She is actually going to profit from staying in jail. I don’t know what’s worse: Madonna‘s over-indulgent Kabbalah party or this book deal?
Stewart has reportedly asked her lawyer Allen Grubman’s aides to pitch her proposed literary offering to New York publishers, while she serves her sentence in a West Virginia institution.
Can I get a unanimous, “BITTTCH!!?” I don’t know about you, but I’d much rather read other inmates’ take on Martha’s stay rather than Martha’s own bullshit version.
Ok, on to more important news: LAKERS BABY! I just want to take a second to say that Phil Jackson is a shoulder pads wearing arrogant bastard & that whenever I say Suckramento, I’m actually referring to the Sacromento Quee–I mean Kings. Here are the scores from their exhibtion games, followed with analysis.
Tue, Oct 12 Lakers 80, Seattle 87 – WHAT THE HELL?!
Sun, Oct 17 Lakers 94, Golden State 80 – No Surprise
Tue, Oct 19 Lakers 105, Sacramento 80 – HAHAHAHHAHAH
Thu, Oct 21 Lakers 88, Golden State 90 OT – What the—?
Fri, Oct 22 Lakers 113, L.A. Clippers 102 – Dude, Clippers suckass.
Sun, Oct 24 Lakers 111, Phoenix 103 – Bitches.
Mon, Oct 25 Lakers 117, Seattle 91 – Obviously, the first game was a fluke.
News: Caron Butler rocks the house at a time when the starting line-up is being discussed. Unfortunately, Odom is in a bloody slump, so he better get his mojo back into gear just incase Kobe gets any ideas of screwing any housekeepers on their various roadtrips! haha–okok! I’m sorry! And lastly, there’s finally someone who looks up to Vlade!