The Bastardly Evening News – Jan. 20, 2006


* Kirsten Dunst is fucking repulsing…and I’m not the only one that thinks so. Check out the look on Jake’s face, it looks like he wants to spit on her for being so crass and disgusting. Anyway, Dunst’s beastliness aside, I just wanted to use that picture as an example of the fantasticalness that can be found past this link. A huge fucking collection of pictures of celebrities eating. It is strangely fascinating for some reason…and suprising at how many pics of Nicole Ritchie there are. Bon Appetit! [CelebritiesEating]

* Christorpher Lee is a freakin’ Samurai, old school in a good way, rocking mad skills and with respect for those that EARN it. He disses the current crop of “actors” making the rounds on our screens as having no skills other than a pretty face and laments the passing of times where you actually had to act to be an actor. I could not agree with him more. It’s insulting that people like Vin Diesel, Colin Farrell, Kirsten Dunst and their ilk have the audacity to call what they do acting. He does give special mention and respect to one current actor – Johnny Depp. Once again, I could not agree with him more. Holla! [ThisIsLondon]

Is it possible for Paris Hilton to prove herself to be dumber and trashier than she already has in the few years she’s been in the media spotlight? The answer, my good friends, is yes. Peep the Trifecta of Trash coutesty of Ms. Hilton…keep in mind all this shit is recent.

* First, bitch gets so wasted she pisses herself in a cab (nice move *heiress*)….the cabbie has the towel he used to mop up her urine as proof of the peepee actually occuring. [BreakingNews]

Trashiness, check. Next up, Ignorance.

* If you have time, I suggest you read all this next thing. The transcript from her deposition in the Graff case (where Paris falsely accused some chick of heinous acts, for which Paris is now being sued for) is fucking sheer brilliance. Paris lets us know she has no idea England is in Europe and informs us that everyone in Europe speaks French. She also blurts out “I’m so hungry” on numerous occasions and lets us know that what she writes in emails doesn’t count because “it’s just words”. [TMZ]

This is the best one…particularly after the two above…

* Paris refuses to pose in Playboy, as if it is under her, because, as she put it, “I’m Paris Hilton”. Does that mean she won’t do it cuz everyone and their mom has seen her naked already and won’t pay a dime to check out her skank, self-pissing, ignorant ass again? [Egotastic]

I do not condone violence against women at all, but I would *really* like to give Paris Hilton a nice kick in the Vagina.

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paris has a vagina???


Johnny Depp is great...


Here here! Paris Hilton is a filthy hose who is probably responsible for America's recent rise in syphilis cases!