Bastardly Breaking News! Jessica Alba Gets a New Dog! Oh My God!

Rumor has it that E.M.D. (Excessive Masturbation Disorder) was the root of Jessica’s pug’s death. What do expect when your life is filled w/ beautiful sights of your hottie owner butt-naked in the shower, or taking sweet-smelling Jessica Alba Dumps, or even having endless amounts of sex. You can either hang yourself from lack of J.Alba sexual activity or you can masturbate yourself to death. May God have mercy on that little pug.

Aside from her pug’s unfortunate death, the act of dog walking is the thing to do these days, I tell you. Jackson, our resident Horndogg reporter covering the complex business of superficial dog walking, has compiled an extensive collection of camerawhores walking their dogs.

Check the links, as well as the rest of the photos below.

- Alyssa Milano
- Jessica Biel
- Rachel Bilson
- Jessica Biel…again.
- Kate Bossworth
- Rachel Bilson…again.
- Rachel Bilson…and again.
- Mariah Carey
- Jodie Marsh

View All Photos ›

27 comments
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gangster g
gangster g

I love jessica alba! shes the hottest but who gives a ratsass what king of dog she has. and all of yall that hate her

go to hell sorry ass bitches!

ill kick ut asses

som1
som1

i love jessica alba !!! i dun care what others say.i think they r juz jealous of her looks n body n all dat..

i think da picture's a fake! any1 could have juz taken other woman body n put jessica's face. all ppl hu thinks she's a bitch are soooo wrong!!!

chelasey99
chelasey99

the girl is human too...she is just tired of those nice photo shots ...if its not for the money...she would have another of those obsessive-compulsive syndrome attack ! give here a break ! after all california was a former mexican state in the 18th century...the dog is a celebrity !

lemon
lemon

Alba's got a pretty feminine face, a nice shapely and round ass and a perfect B/C cup to compliment her slim and toned body. She's good looking. If she's not your type you can say so, but calling her flat (which she's obviosuly not) and fat (even more obviously not) in the same time or saying she's ugly is just funny. And making a whole long rant about it like a little whiny ugly girl is annoying.

PS: Honey, what's that picture supposed to prove? That someone took Jessica Alba's pretty head and glued it on a very hot woman's body?? Or that you're jealous? I think it proved both!

alexx: Beyonce and Jessica Simpson?? You've got an absoluetly horrible taste in women!

25toLife
25toLife

It's not nice to say bad things about girls adored by other people... I'm sure you know how annoying it is, just like someone saying bad things about a particular type of music.

honey
honey

ok see her boobs

seriously

wiat

no

see her w/e thats there

that aint boobs

she has nooo boobs

how do ppl insist on believing the Into the Blue Photos

comeonnn

shez flattttt

like FLATTT

and shez fuglyyy

ADam she has makeup on

not minimal..wah average girls call ALOT OF MAKEUP

how is it that its ok for ugly celebs like falba to wear makeup

buh when an average girl wears it.and looks Hot its not

FUCK OFF seriouslyy

shez ugly

get over this overrated fat cunt

kittyxo
kittyxo

hahah jessica is boob-less!!!

alexx
alexx

fuck adam ... n ppl do u not now what hot means it doset not mean beutiful shes not that hot she so fucking overatedd fuck gett over this bitchh her body is not that speaicall i see fucking hotter girls everyday hot means you want to fuck n sex apeal not beautiful n would u rather fuck hot gurl wit a great amout of sex apeal fuck beautiful beyonce is fucking hot n jlo n simpson alba no wayyyy

YourJustJEALOUS!
YourJustJEALOUS!

heehee i agree with you baboon alba-- by the way, LOVE your name!!!! :)

baboon alba
baboon alba

Is that Cash Warren in that pic if that is him then he is one ugly guy, they make the perfect couple both ugly

SURFER
SURFER

I know Dark Angel is no longer on the air, and I've never actually seen that show, but I absolutely hate Jessica Alba. Her "beauty" is perhaps the most overrated in Hollywood today and I have yet to see or read an interview where she does not come across as a completely stuck-up snob. Add to that the fact that she is a horrible actress. I know I can't be the only one who despises her.

Cammi
Cammi

fucking quit it #9 we all know you are NOT vito!!!!!

VITO
VITO

LOL BRANDON!!!!!!!

VITO
VITO

YO NUMBER 9 IS NOT ME.

WE ALL KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT SLOBBA. STOP TRYIN TO FUCKIN SIGN ON AS ME YOU FUCKING DIPSHIT.

Ashley
Ashley

How many tatto's does she have?

VITO
VITO

DAMN THAT DOG AND DAMN THAT MAN!!!

I WANT ALBA NOW!!!

GIMME GIMME GIMME

Dr. Zoidberg
Dr. Zoidberg

whats up with girls getting pits? jessica biel had a pit bull pup too.

Brandon
Brandon

just another boring old bitch from mexico. take a whiff, you know she reeks

Evanty
Evanty

Her dog didnt actually die, did it?

Adam
Adam

This girl is so beautiful.. no special lights or cameras or makeup.. and she's still hot as hell..