Bastardly Lady of the Day – Ashley

Ashley writes:

Hello, I love your site! Hopefully you’ll consider me as a candidate for one of your BLOTD’s!! I’ve only been a Bastardly Addict for a few months now but I’m hooked and thought I’d share my pics. I’m not jailbait either, and it gets a little annoying having people tell me that. To try and prove this, I’m also sending in last years graduation pic. So here you are Bastardly Community! You guys ready for me??

Which female celebrity would you go lesbian for?

Jessica Alba definitely, I’m in love with that girl’s body. Scarlett Johansson if she were a little less pale and Angelina Jolie before she got pregnant.

Do you like your boobs?

Yeah, I’m happy with them…do you guys like them? lol

Would you sleep with a dude the age of your grandpa for $3,000,000?

Yeah, I’m not going to lie like every other girl that comes on here, I’d do it. I was raised being spoiled my whole life, so I’m as materialistic as your typical girl would be.

Have people (guys) ever said you look like a particular celebrity (…to try and get in your pants)?

I’ve gotten Katie Holmes before, which I don’t take as a compliment so for everyone’s information it didn’t work! Sorry, I just don’t find her attractive.

What makes you Bastardly?

I have a nice little body and a nice set of boobs! I’m high maitenence in general so I pick up on little details about people and freely point them out, I’m not afraid to tell you what I think!

*Are you a Bastardly Lady of the Day? If you too would like to be considered to be a Bastardly Lady of the Day feel free to send hot pictures to moejackson.com@gmail.com. Please note that you will be subject to the gauntlet of our loyal readers and we won’t be so nice as to actually “take down” pictures. Cheers!

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70 comments
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Jessy
Jessy

lol, oh goodness...

a nice little body? not true.

and your face is average looking...

but the most unattractive part about you is your personality...it has to go.

Endomanc
Endomanc

She looks like my ex and i fucked her off cos it felt like banging my sister if i had a sister, which i don't, but that's what it'd feel like i'd imagine. Anyway i digress, show us your nipples.

grunge lvr
grunge lvr

please. katie holmes is waaay prettier than you are. Scarlett Johansson may be pale, but she wears it real good. Angelina Jolie still looks hot even after giving birth.

yomomma
yomomma

for someone with all pics of ripped guys in her room, you think she would work on her tummy

ugh
ugh

Which female celebrity would you go lesbian for?

"..Scarlett Johansson if she were a little less pale and Angelina Jolie before she got pregnant."

yeah, no chance anyway. the two are wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy in an upper league.

JTLG
JTLG

This look would look better on a friendly, classy young chick. Not some high-maintenance bitch. Keep the trash coming!

Sophia
Sophia

*sigh* here we go: You have an average body, and a below average face. I do not consider you ugly. However, you are not as attractive as you think you are.

This is what you should do (in my humble opinion, which really doesn't amount to shit... and actually, it's not like you asked anyway. But here we go...)

*Keep the hair shorter, and layered. Do a side part, and don't straighten it. You want more volume, your hair appears too thin to straighten. Pick a richer hair color, as well. No more highlights.

*Throw out the outfits. You have an average body and the more you leave to the imagination, the better. It's much sexier to conceal, rather than displaying it all out there. The jeans have to go. If you insist on wearing them, wear them with a longer, darker shirt, to contrast them.

*Your lips are rather thin, so don't use dark color, give your lips that natural wet look and they will appear bigger. Emphasize your eyes (don't use eye liner on the bottom), and grow in your eyebrows.

*Lose all the rings, you look like a damn gypsy. One or two will suffice, and make sure they aren't tacky.

*Do something about your room. It does appear a bit pre-teen-ish. Get some nice prints and frame them. Tone down the color, and get rid of the shirtless man pics. Guys don't want to see that shit when they're shagging you.

*And finally, we're coming to the section I actually do know something about: your body. I can't tell exactly what the issue is here, but it would appear that the muscles you need to work are the rectus abdominis, and your tendinous inscriptions (they're each a part of your ab muscles. type the names into a search engine to find some exercises which target them)... this will help with that slightly bloated look. Also, (this goes for all ladies), cut down on the booze. It doesn't matter how much you work out, alcohol bloats you like you won't believe. Do some really difficult core workouts, in addition to daily cardio, and I do mean DAILY, not this "3 times a week" bollocks.

You have a good starting off point, my dear, now work with what you have. You're not using your potential. Everyone who has posted so far has had a lot of really good points (some harsher than others) but you need to take them into account. Good luck.

headcheese
headcheese

i'd sleep with you if you were a little less meth.

diana
diana

This is one of the most hilarious posts I've read in a long time. I cant post anything new everyone's taken the words right out of my mouth. Lex's post definately made me laugh the hardest. Im gonna read this post a few more times.

kitkit
kitkit

She's average - she doesn't turn heads and likewise she doesn't burn retinas either...she could however improve her appearance dramatically...so heres my advice to you, BLOTD

1. haircut... first of all the short hair is a much better frame for your face- the long hair makes it look elongated bordering on equine

2. makeup...first of all highlight those gorgeous cheekbones... secondly lose the dark lips ( dark makes things appear smaller)- I would highlight your eyes instead as they are more naturally striking

3. Clothing..dahling this is where you need the most work... dark wash denim ( makes your legs appear thinner and longer) tops in the next size up ( nothing is worse than clothing in too small a size) also on the same note sexy can be subtle..i.e you dont need "hooters" slapped across your chest...any man with the gift of sight can indeed see you have breasts

4. posing... a 3/4 view is generally considered the most flattering perspective for both the face and body ... also placing your hand above your hip makes arms appear thinner and more shapely and help to emphasize the clavicle

so best of luck to you ( and congrats on surviving the gauntlet)... who knows maybe we'll see a gorgeous second round of photos

p.s. although I dont find all of your answers completely annoying...your presumption that any girl would essentially prostitute herself is baseless...so don't speak for all of us next time mkay?

Buck Nasty
Buck Nasty

Exactly Vannuc., I'm sure a lot of parents in their day were studs or babes, but a thing called aging catches up with everybody sooner or later no matter how many times thinks are lifted. Even Dick Clark & George Hamilton are looking old. I want to see a bunch of grandmothers in about 30 years named Tiffany or Brittney with big above the ass tatoos & fake boobs that's going to be a roar.

Vannuccia
Vannuccia

She's not that bad, there are far uglier girls out there. She's just young and doesn't know how to dress properly yet. She needs to learn what looks best on her, and get her own style. On the plus side, she's got good skin and good bone structure- which is more than most people have.

Btw- The comments on her parents are out of line. They didn't ask to be on this site. Besides, they look happy, friendly and what I imagine the average American parent to look like (that's meant to be a compliment;) Do you expect every parent to look like the picture of perfection?

Bitch
Bitch

You get jailbait? I'm surprised. I though you had more of a rode hard put away wet forty year whore at a truck stop thing going on.

Buck Nasty
Buck Nasty

Megan, believe me these are men out here, she is bone-able. Most women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place. In this case maybe a few shots of tequila also.

BankRoll
BankRoll

High maintenance!!??!?! With a room like this one and the way she dresses, plz!

Angelfood
Angelfood

That was my point Megan. Society keeps telling these younguns that they are hot, beautiful, and perfect. But the real world is gonna hit them in the face. I am sure Ashley is beautiful to her parents and family but by society's standard she leaves quite a bit to be desired. What is so bad about honesty? About preparing our youth for the tough challenges of the real world? It sucks, that Ashley had to hear reality in the bastardly way --by running the gauntlet...she has major work to do - and truly didn't even know it! Sad commentary to our times...

Megan
Megan

Hahaha, I didn't think so.

But jesus, c'mon!

I would've much rather preferred to see some bullshit photo shopped photo that made her look at least bone-able...

Angelfood
Angelfood

Megan...you made me laugh...you "warned us" ..."I am going to be critical" ...it's okay...no one is gonna slam you for it! hahahahaha

Megan
Megan

I'm going to be critical...

Please but a bag over that face.. No, you don't have a cute body, it's average, just like her tits that are obviously held up from the most massive padded bra money could buy...

longpole
longpole

she could suck me off but thats it

Angelfood
Angelfood

That room is the ugliest shit I ever seen...sad example here of mom/dad and the relatives telling her she is just a beauty and all that shit at schools these days always passing tests and never NOT making the team has given these young chickie-poos a sad mistaken impression that they are "in" and "doing just fine"...reality...the real world is gonna kick you back to the curb until you learn some valuable lessons in rejection. Quit livin' in la-la land about your faults...sure you will always be daddy's beautiful little girl...just time to GROW UP now...the real world isn't an automatic WIN! You have potential but you have to work for it...lose the weight etc...it will not be handed to you like your little league trophy was...

Buck Nasty
Buck Nasty

Dalton, I did not say one thing to Wiseman for that Nasty little unwitty attempt at humor.

He's an uneducated piece of shit from the streets of London and god no I am not friends with him, his friends are blow up dolls & his Mum, thats it. And he fucks them both.

Ceenitall
Ceenitall

High maintenance in her world must mean you get your own window air conditioner, your own pair of jeans and all the hooters shirts your older sister can get at work!

Dalton
Dalton

You and Wiseman argue everyday...what's up with that? You two friends or somethin?

Sandra Carmen
Sandra Carmen

HA, I was kidding. Just trying to make a point. She's obviously easy, and let's guys slip roofies in the shot.

Wiseman
Wiseman

His father left that slut of a mother of his, no one wonder he churned out so fruit coated.

Wiseman
Wiseman

And Buck Nazi gets more sick and homo each day. Fucking sheep raper.

Buck Nasty
Buck Nasty

Sandra Carmen, I will look foward to these pictures you send in, prepare to be mounted. You may not fuck some geezer for 3,000,000.00 but be prepared to be raped by 100 bastards.

Buck Nasty
Buck Nasty

Jen says" Blah,blah,blah.... professional photos, and I don’t have that many candids! " Meaning what?? Are you a model ??? Makeup artist???? Candids meaning ???? home movies, private photos. It's OK if you are hidiously disfigured, people won't "judge" you to harshly around here. And about the Texas thing, sorry.

Sandra Carmen
Sandra Carmen

BTW-Just because a girl says no to the million dollar question doesn't mean she's lying fucktards. That's disgusting. I pity this bitch

Sandra Carmen
Sandra Carmen

Not every girl gives her self up easy like you to some old haggard geezer, you whore. Some of us have morals and respect our self. All that money means nothing to me. I'm sending my pics in next week maybe.

Debbie
Debbie

Ok she aint that pretty, but look at first picture.... nice cheek bones! you gotta give her that at least.

You are right about something, you do have nice boobies... I'll give you that too..

Ummm I dont know if you have realized yet, but you are not thaaaaaat skinny.... so please think it twice before showing us your belly beer... is not sexy!

Not a girl not yet a woman... ya.... but the decoration of your room HAS to go..... its a MUST

Short hair... keep it!

Buck Nasty
Buck Nasty

Moss, I don't think they are going to hear or "read" this genius, I'm sure your parents were GQ & Cosmo models. More like Honcho & Hustler. And here's a fucking news flash retard, ugly people fuck too, so do stupid people and you are living proof. Poof.

Jennifer
Jennifer

Buck, I have no clue who you are or what in the world you're talking about, but I live in Texas. You're a very odd person...

Buck Nasty
Buck Nasty

Catie H, I would rather an underthecounter culture blod.

moss
moss

Nope... the parents are fair game

1. They are ugly in the face and yet, they bred and produced ugly offspring

2. They created a monster by "spoiling" the daughter.

All in all they NEED to hear the TRUTH

caitie harmful
caitie harmful

Again I say....can we please get a counterculture chick for BLOTD?????!

Buck Nasty
Buck Nasty

Jesus, Lex I'm glad you didn't have time to say what you really meant, next time just drive to the girls house & beat her with a hammer it will save all of us time. Jennifer since when is the Los Angeles Vice Squad doing professional photos??? Just wait till next time they pick you up for blowing some homeless guy for 5.00 dollars & cab fare & send that "head" shot in.

Jennifer
Jennifer

el duro, I'd be more than happy to show you my face, but the people here get all pissed off and anal retentive about professional photos, and I don't have that many candids!

saintdevil
saintdevil

What school did she graduate from?

Can't spell maintenance and doesn't seem to know what the word means.

Also, less than average looking, conceited and plain annoying.

Posting that pic with her parents is a really stupid move.

Mum and Dad are going to be so pleased...

Tori
Tori

she has that "deer-in-headlights" look.

that's all i can say.

LEX
LEX

oh no, i have so much to say, yet i need to run... so i'll narrow it down to 8 1/2:

1) when you grow up you're gonna be fat, poor, and ugly like your mom (grad pic). and your dad is trashy. you have a terrible gene pool, it's almost sad

2) you really need to do pilates, or 5000 crunches, or get lipo on those chunky love handles and flanks. plus you have a puffy tummy, so keep your shirt on

3) you're face is ugly... you look like a yogoslavic/jewish mix, very strange

4) your hair looks butch. if you're so 'spoiled' why do you go to supercuts. seriously, grow it out or get extensions, and try washing it. greasy helmut head hair is gross

5) you look nothing like katie holmes. i don't find her all that pretty, but she's certainly 'cute'. you are not pretty, not even cute. has anyone ever told you that you resemble a muppet before?

6) having a bird or hamster or whatever lives in that cage next to your bed is nasty... they live in their own feces, and are smelly, so i'll bet your room smells like a rodent

7) i actually like the pink paint, but the jamaican-esque stripes have got to go.

8) do you have a thyroid problem...? you're eyes buldge out, and that's a symptom. you might want a blood test, cause they have pills that can help

8 1/2) if you do have a thyroid problem and get meds, you might lose the chub around your midsection--those pills will rev up your metabolism.... if you don't need meds, consider buying them on the black market in an effort to shed some weight

ok, i need to run. i feel kinda badly, i think this was mean of me... meaner than usual. i hope i don't have bad karma now... in a half-assed attempt to ease the universe's perception of me: i'm sorry, i'm just playing around... kinda..

Buck Nasty
Buck Nasty

Ok, Paps not everyone can have a father thats a hitman Hells Kitchen.

Buck Nasty
Buck Nasty

Cute, ok bod, nice bressesssesss. Fuck you Moss, lay off the old hippie pictures of her parents, I'm sure whatever pod you dropped out of has dried up & blown away long ago. Synon lets get off Mothers, I just got off yours.

Big Papi
Big Papi

If this skank is going to post pics of her parents, then they are fair game as well. Her dad looks like the night manager at a bowling alley.

El Duro
El Duro

Poresita...you guys are BASTARDS!!!

With all these crazy comments....One thing though...

The Comments are to critique and people here do it...so you can make a change for the good.

JENNIFER's comments are kinda true.......

JENNIFER SHOW US YOUR FACE!!!!

fatso
fatso

lol at sending in a grad pic with the parents...

P_Iceman7
P_Iceman7

Well, I'm pretty sure she's happy she's a BLOTD!!