Juliana Martins Brings The Afternoon Links!

- Lady GaGa Because I’m On A Diet [HollywoodTuna]
- Donna Feldman is hot [CO-ED Magazine]
- Lindsay Lohan Passive Aggressive Finger [Drunken Stepfather, NSFW]
- Isla Fisher “Very Close” To Marrying Sasha Baron Cohen [I'm Not Obsessed]
- In beautiful people news . . [Celebslam]

- Wifey or Trifey: Fergie [Complex]
- Who Is Hot Slut Of The Year? [Dlisted]
- Russell Crowe is Too Fat for Sienna Miller [Yeeah!]
- Cameron Diaz Needs To Dye Her Hair [Derek Hail]
- Angelina and Brad snub Ryan Seacrest [The Blemish]

- Top 100 meest sexy chicks [Flabber]
- Jessica Alba Attempts Golf and Fails [Celeb Parasite]
- Coolio thinks computers came from space and movies predict the future [Cele|bitchy]
- More who wore it best….At the Golden Globes this time…. [The Bastardly Society]

- WOLF BLITZER GETS JIGGY [Unibrow]
- Jessica Biel Has a Great Pair [The Grumpiest]
- Layla Kayleigh Is Shwingtastic In Tight Jeans [Popoholic]
- Are you a Bastardly Lady of the Day? [The Bastardly]

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22 comments
sandman
sandman

nice flat arse and perfect size tits

Goliano
Goliano

Dude, you actually read past the screen name?

Goliano
Goliano

If it weren't for jumping to conclusions you'd get no exercise.

kite string
kite string

pam you're calling someone a racist? you? come on pam you are still on some of white power trip from the 50s. maybe thats why you're sick? maybe its not crack? maybe its white power and white powder? GET HELP ASAP

kite string
kite string

someone walk in on their girl with another man? a man of color? get over it hillbilly. get back to shinin' YEEEEEE-HAWWWWWWWWW

The Bane Of Faggots Like Golihomo And All Niggaz
The Bane Of Faggots Like Golihomo And All Niggaz

To all the niggers that might read this: This site is called the BASTARDLY and all I'm trying to do here is be a bastard. So STFU and enjoy these amazing jokes.

What do you call a nigger with a peg leg?

Shit on a stick! -joe

Why do niggers always have sex on their minds?

Because they have pubes on their heads! -Bo

What does Pontiac stand for?

Poor Old Nigger Thinks It's A Cadillac! -ricky

Did you hear the one about . .

. . the baby nigger who went to heaven and got his wings? He said, "God! Look! I'm an angel!", and God said, "No you stupid nigger! You're a bat, now eff off!"

I like black people . . .

. . I used to have some black friends 'till my dad sold them!

What does a nigress and an ice hockey player have in common?

They both change their pads after 3 periods! -ashmoor

Why do blacks have white hands and feet?

They were on all fours when God spray painted them!

Why do black people have white hands?

They were up against the wall when God spray painted them!

Why do black people have white hands?

Everyone has some good in them! -bonz

Why do black people have white hands?

It rubs off the cop cars! -bonz

Why do more niggers get hit by cars in the winter?

They're easier to spot! -brenden

What do you call two blacks on one bike?

Organized crime! -bobo

Why are niggers getting stronger?

T.V.s are getting bigger! -tim

What happened to the nigger who had an abortion?

Crime Stoppers sent her a check for $500! -tim

Why don't nigger bitches wear panties to picnics?

To keep the flies away from the chicken! -michael

What's the difference between a truck full of baby niggers and a truck full of bowling balls?

You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork!

What does FUBU stand for?

Farmers Used to Buy Us

What does FUBU stand for?

Farmers Used to Beat Us

Why don't sharks eat niggers?

They think its whale shit!

Why do niggers call white people "honkies"?

Thats the last sound they hear before they get hit! -davey

What do they do with dead niggers in California?

Gut them to make wetsuits! -kara

Why does L.A. have so many fags and N.Y. so many niggers?

L.A. had first choice! -David

What do you call a chinese nigger with AIDS?

Coon Die Soon - David

What does NAACP stand for?

Niggers Against All Caucasian People

What does NAACP stand for?

Now Apes Are Called People -Brandon

Why did God give niggers big dicks?

As a way to say "sorry" for putting pubes on their heads! -igor

Why do niggers wear wide brimmed hats?

So birds won't shit on their lips! -Tim

Why was white chocolate invented?

So nigger kids could get messy too! -Kev

What do you call a niggers car?

A 'blood vessel'. -Dean

What do you call 1,000 niggers going down a hill?

A mudslide! -robbie

What do Nikes and the KKK have in common?

They both make niggers run fast! -Jimmy

Why is there no black Miss America pageant?

Nobody want's to be Ms. Idaho! -Zeigler

What do you get when you cross a nigger and a gorilla?

A dumb gorilla! -Adam

What do you call a nigger having sex?

Rape! -Adam

How many polacks does it take to clean a bathroom?

None, it's a niggers job! -Sheeky

White folks aren't racist . .

. . we've all got colored TV's! -bob

Why do niggers hate aspirin?

Because it's white and it works! -Christian

A nigger walks into a bar and says, "Yo! Where do all the homies hang?". The bartender says, "out there", pointing to a tree in the back. -jon

What do you call an Ethiopian on a hunger strike?

An Ethiopian! -Jeremy

How many niggers does it take a shingle a roof?

It depends how thin you slice them! -Donald

How do you get a nigger out of a tree?

Cut the rope!

Why don't nigger babies play in sandboxes?

Cats keep trying to bury them! -Donald

What do you call 60,000 niggers on a plane heading back to Africa?

A good start! -Donald

What do you call a nigger hiding in the woods?

A brown recluse! -Donald

What do you call a black bowling ball?

A nigger egg. -J

What did God say when he made the first nigger?

Oops! I put the pubes on his head! -J

What was missing from the Million Man March?

About a thousand miles of chain and an auctioneer!

What do Confederates do on the New Year?

Shoot niggers with roman candles and throw Confetti! -ozz

How do you get a nigger to wear a condom?

Put a Nike logo on it! -c

How do you keep a nigger bitch pleased?

Give her some fried chicken! -Andrea

What do you call 1,000 niggers at the bottom of the sea?

A good start! -Sebastian

What did God say when he made the second nigger?

Oops! Burnt another one! -Nick

Why haven't any niggers died from West Nile virus?

Mosquitos don't land on shit, only flies do! -eGod

What did the nigger get on his SATs?

Barbecue sauce! -Mike

Why don't niggers like blow jobs?

Niggers don't like ANY jobs! -Jesse Dawson

What is a nigger?

Proof that skunks fuck monkeys! -Jesse Dawson

What happened when the Nigger looked up his family tree?

A gorilla shat on his face! -Steve

What do you call a busload of niggers going off a cliff with one empty seat?

A crying shame! -sean

What do you call 1,000 niggers at the bottom of the sea?

A good start! -Sebastian

Why is a nigger like a vending machine?

Neither work, but they both take your money! -Kyle

Why are blacks so tall?

Their knee grows. -Nigger Hater

What do you call a bunch of old niggers in a barn?

Antique farm equiptment!

What do you call a black man with a pole in his back?

Shit on a stick! -mark

Why do they put cotton in pill bottles?

To remind the niggers they used to pick cotton before they were drug dealers! -coady

Why was the nigger with diarrea freaking out?

He thought he was melting! -Robyn

Why does Stevie Wonder always smile?

He doesn't know he's black. -J

What's the difference between bigfoot and a working nigger?

Bigfoot's been spotted! -big jake

What's the definition of Mass Confusion?

Fathers day in Harlem! -jedthrow

What do you call a nigger with an afro?

Microphone. -Nikki

What do you call two blacks in a bodybag?

Twix! -Nikki

Why are there only 2 pall bearer at a niggers funeral?

A garbage can only has two handles! -mike

What does a nigger give his kid for his birthday?

YOUR bike! -mike

Why shouldn't you throw rocks at a nigger driving by?

It could be your car! -mike

Why did the man take off his watch to grab a handful of jelly beans?

He was afraid the blacks would steal it!

How do we know Adam wasn't black?

Ever try taking a rib from a black guys?

What's long, dark and stinks?

The unemployment line!

Why do niggers and spics always have nice clothes, jewelry and cars but still live in shitty houses?

They haven't figured out how to steal houses yet! -Johnny Reb

Why can't Ray Charles or Stevie Wonder read?

They're niggers!

A woman meets a black guy and invites him back to her place. She handcuffs herself to the bed and screams, "Do what you black men do best!". The nigger grabs the TV and runs! -Alex

What's blue and hangs in my front yard? My nigger! I'll paint him whatever color I want!

What's a black mans fortune cookie? A peice of cornbread with a food stamp in the middle! -Frank

How does a niggress take a pregnancy test? She sticks a banana up her pussy, if it comes out half-eaten you know there's another monkey on the way! -Wo

What's 8 miles long and has a combined IQ of 56? The Martin Luther King Day parade! -Mr. KKK

What's the difference between a nigger and Batman? Batman can go out at night without Robbin -Crystal

What did Lincoln say after a three day drinking binge?

I freed WHO? -Jesse Dawson

What's the worst thing you can call a black man, starting with N and ending with R?

Neighbor! -Subzie

A redneck is driving down the road one day and see's a sign that says coon season is in. He goes a bit further down the road and see a field of niggers picking watermelons. He stops, takes out his gun and starts shooting. A cop comes up and asks him what he's doing so he says, "I saw a sign back there that said coon season was in!", the cop says, "yea, but you're hunting in a baited field!" -sam

Why do niggers eat Tootsie Rolls with a fork?

So they don't bite off their fingers! -Nettie

What's the difference between a nigger and a bag of shit?

The bag!

What do you call the million man march in the rain?

"Gorillas in the mist" -Jethro

Once there was a nigger who decided to have a bar-b-q on the front lawn of the local church. Another nigger walked up and told him he'd better leave before the priest came out and called the cops since all the spooks knew the priest was a racist. The doors of the church swung open and the second nigger jumped into the bushes. The priest came out and he could see the priest was upset, but couldn't hear what he was saying. He saw the priests arms go up, down, left and right and then he went back inside.

The nigger came out from the bush and asked his friend how he'd gotten the priest to bless him! The first nigger said he wasn't being blessed, the priest pointed up and said, "Nigger! Get your Bar-B-Q", pointed down and said, "your nigger friend hiding in the bush", pointed left to right and said, "and get the fuck out!" -Travis

What's the difference between a nigger and a letter?

You can send the letter back where it came from! -Ryan

What do you call a bunch of niggers neck-deep in mud?

Afro-turf

What do you call a bunch of niggers skydiving?

Air pollution! -shawn

What's long and hard on a nigger?

Third grade.

A nigger with a parrot walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, where did you get that?"

The parrot says, "Africa! There are millions of them over there just sitting around"

What does NAACP stand for?

Niggers Are Actually Colored People.

What does NAACP stand for?

Niggers Are Always Causing Problems.

What does NAACP stand for?

Niggers, Apes, Aligators, Coons and Possums. - mike

What do you call a nigger waterskiing?

A top-water jig. -heywood

What would you call the flintstones if they were black?

Niggers! -dave

A nigger, a jew and a mexican jump off a building at the same time .. who hits the ground first?

Who cares! -Chris

How do you keep a nigger from drowning?

Take your boot off his head. -Klaus

Ever hear the rumor that niggers are bigger than white men? How do you tell when a nigger is really well hung?

When you can't fit a finger between his neck and the rope! -spinner

What do you say to a black man in court?

Will the defendant please rise! -Tee

What do you call a black man in high school?

Janitor -Tee

What's the only way a person can look at a nigger and smile?

Through the scope of a gun! -jaycee

Why do niggers keep chickens in their back yards?

To teach their kids how to walk. -nathan

How do you keep a nigger from jumping on the bed?

Put velcro on the ceiling.

Whats the difference between a nigger and a bucket of shit?

The bucket. -Heidi

What do an apple and a nigger have in common?

They both belong hanging in trees.

Why don't niggers celibrate Thanksgiving?

KFC is closed on holidays. -c

How do you starve a nigger?

Hide his foodstamps under his work boots.

What do you call seven niggers hanging in a tree?

A windchime.

What are three things you can't give a nigger?

A fat lip, a black eye and a job!

What's the difference between a dead dog in a road and a dead nigger in a road?

The dog has skid marks in front of it. -james

What do you call a black priest?

Holy shit! -ccc

I had a nigger in my family tree . . .

. . . he's still hanging there!

Why are trees so close in Harlem?

Public transportation. -Chris

How long does it take a nigress to take a shit?

9 months -CJ

What do you call a nigger with a Harvard education?

A nigger! - Josh

What do you call a nigger on the moon? A problem.

What do you call five niggers on the moon? A problem.

What do you call all the niggers on the moon? Problem solved! - Hayley

What does NAACP stand for?

Niggers Around America Causing Problems -Sam

Why did so many niggers die in Vietnam?

When they were told to get down they started break dancing! -Ray

What do you call a nigger in a suit?

Guilty! -Ryan

What do you call a black roofer?

Shit on a shingle! -Gino

If life were a jacket where would the niggers live?

In the hood! -Kev

What do you call a busload of niggers?

A rotten banana -Jake

What do you call a bunch of niggers buried neck deep in your driveway?

Blacktop -Jeff

What do you throw a drowning nigger?

It's wife and kids! -Adam

Why are all the niggers fast runners?

All the slow ones are in jail.

Whats the difference between niggers and snow tires?

Snow tires don't sing when you put chains on them!

How do you keep a nigger from going out?

Pour more gas on him! - Jarrett

Why do white folks go to nigger garage sales?

To get their stuff back. - J

How do you keep niggers out of your back yard?

Hang one in your front yard!

What does a nigger and sperm have in common?

Only about 1 out of two million actually work. - John

What do you do if you wake up in the middle of the night to see your television floating in mid-air?

Shoot the nigger stealing it.

What's the difference between a large pizza and a nigger?

A pizza can feed a family of four.

What's wrong with four niggers in a cadillac going off a cliff?

A cadillac seats five! - Garrett

How can you tell a nigger's just had sex?

His eyes are all red from the mace.

How do you get a nigger to leave you alone?

Throw him a basketball! -J

What's the difference between a naked white woman and a naked black woman?

One's on the cover of Playboy and the other's on the cover of National Geographic. -obb

Why don't niggers dream?

The last one to have a dream got shot.

Theres an American airline and one of the engines is going out so they decide they need to get rid of some weight or they will crash. To do it fairly they decide to do it in alphabetical order. So they tell all of the African Americans to jump off the plane, no one moves. So they say, "Okay, all the blacks jump off." Still no one jumps. So they say, "All of the colored people jump off." Still no one jumps. Finally this little kid walks up to his dad and says, "Daddy, aren't we all three of those?" And the dad says, "Nope, today we're NIGGERS, we aint jumpin before the MEXICANS."

A nigger and a spic fall from a tree, who hits the ground first?

The spic, the nigger never makes it because he's stopped by the rope.

There was a blackout in my neighborhood last night.

I had to shoot him before he stole everything. - stu

What would Martin Luther King, Jr be if he was white?

Alive! -Jessica

A Nigger runs into a doctor's office and says, "Doctor, Doctor I can't stop running around!" The doctor says, "Okay, take this tablet." The Nigger slows down and stops. He said, "WOW! It really worked! I've tried everything! What was it?" The doctor says, "It's Persil - Stops colours running." -Lee

What's the most confusing day in Harlem?

Fathers Day!

Why do niggers have white palms?

There's a little good in everyone. -J

What do you call a nigger rolling uphill?

Black magic! -Donald

What do you call a white man in a group of twenty black men?

Tarzan of the apes. -Tim

Why don't niggers ride Harleys?

They hear run nigger nigger -Christina

What do you call a field full of niggers?

A shooting range! -James

What's the only good nigger?

A dead nigger!

What's the difference between a nigger and an orange?

The orange is alive when you take it off the tree. -McGirk

How did blacks invent break-dancing?

Trying to steal hubcaps off moving cars. -bman

What do you call a bunch of niggers in a pool?

Coco Puffs -Zack

What do you say when you see bigfoot?

Freeze you hairy nigger! -Jesse

Why are niggers so good at basketball?

It's the only game where they can run, shoot and steal -Jay

What do a slinky and a nigger have in common?

Both are useless and it's fun to watch them both falling down the stairs -Jordan

Did you hear about the nigger who died on the highway?

He stuck his head out the window going 100mph and his lips beat him to death! -matt

How do you get 30 niggers into a Volkswagon?

Throw in a welfare check.

How do you get them out?

Throw in a job application! - Josh

Why do they put cotton on top of asperin bottles?

To remind niggers they picked cotton before they were drug dealers! -Tom

What's a niggers favorite drink?

Cotton GIN -Jobe

What do you call a nigger with shit on its shoulder?

Two-headed! -Cai

What do you call a nigger falling off a cliff?

A chocolate drop! -Cai

What did the nigger say while he was running next to a zebra?

"Now you see me - now you don't . . " -Gabbi

What does NBA stand for?

Niggers Bouncing Around -Steve

A little nigger was helping it's grandma in the kitchen, spilling some flour on his face he looked up and said, "Look grandma! I'm a white boy now!" His grandma whooped his ass and told him to go tell his mom what he'd said. He goes into the living room and says, "Look momma! I'm a white boy now!" His mom whoops his ass and tells him to go tell his father what he'd told her. He walks outside and says, "Look pappy! I'm a white boy now!" His father whoops his ass and then asks him what he learned. He says, "I've only been white for five minutes and I already hate you fucking niggers!" -Kurious George

Why do niggers smell?

So blind people can hate them too! -Kevin

Why don't niggers like barn dances?

Everytime they hear there's a 'hoe down' they think their sister got shot! -Jake

What do you get when you breed a nigger with a jew?

A chain of empty retail stores. -Rob

Why are apes always frowning?

They heard that in a million years they'll be niggers! -Puoyan

Why are people like jelly beans?

Nobody likes the black ones!

Why do niggers have low-riders?

So they can pick cotton at 50 miles an hour -Graham

What do you call a nigger with a wooden leg?

A waste of wood! -Subzie

Did you know Oprah and Stevie Wonder both had the same nick name in school?

It was nigger! -Subzie

Why'd the nigger have shit in his wallet?

For I.D. - Subzie

What do you call a nigger in tree wearing a suit and holding a briefcase?

Branch manager! - Heather

What do you call a nigger with white hair?

A pint of Guiness - zander

What's a nigger got in common with a bike?

Neither can work without chains - richard

A man walks into a shoe store looking for a nice pair of shoes. An assistant asks if he can help, so the man tells the assistant he's looking for a really nice pair of shoes, a pair like nobody else would have. The assistant leads the man to the back room, opens a draw and pulls out a pair of shoes. He says, "These are the most unique shoes, made from human skin! They're $10,000". The man looks at them and says they're a bit pricey, so the assistant says, "We also have them in black for $2.99"

-Lozza

Why are niggers so good at football?

They grow up around hit and runs -ZehnRen

Why do dogs lick their assholes?

To get the taste of nigger out of their mouths.

What do you call the black stuff between an elephants toes?

Slow niggers! -Luke

What's 6 ft tall, black and screams?

Stevie Wonder answering the iron! -Luke

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead niggers?

I don't have a Ferrari in my garage! -Tim

What do you get when you cross a midget with a nigger?

A little shit! - Blade

When does a black man turn into a nigger?

As soon as he leaves the room! - Cain Fleming

Why does New York have niggers while California has earthquakes?

California got first pick! - Cain Fleming

Did you hear the KKK bought the rights to "ROOTS"?

They're going to play it backwards so it has a happy ending! - Cain Fleming

What's the difference between a White owl and a black owl?

The White owl says, "Who! Who!", while the black owl says, "Who dat! Who dat!" - Cain Fleming

Did you hear about the new black Barbie?

She comes with 12 kids, AIDS and a welfare check. - Cain Fleming

What does RAP stand for?

Retarded and poor, Rob and Plunder, Riot and Pound

What does NAACP stand for?

Niggers And Assholes Crashing Parties - bob

Why do niggers drive nice cars, but live in crappy houses?

They haven't figured out how to steal a house yet! -J

What would you do if you had enough money to send half the niggers back to africa?

Send them all back half way - Brian

Why do people hit things when they don't work?

It worked with the slaves! -Arty

LOL @ Goliano

Much like you've accepted your fate as a fucking nigger SLAVE.

Pamela Susan Courson
Pamela Susan Courson

BTW, bet you wouldn't be saying all those things to me you've said since I came across you, if I were black. You Racist Scum

Pamela Susan Courson
Pamela Susan Courson

Feel better? Doubt it. d55 was right about you,

you are clearly a girl pretending to be a boy, or straight out GAYYY. Go talk to your 'girlfriend' Rhonda. Does she know you're a chick?!

Goliano
Goliano

Or thru a high school locker room full of horny male sophomores with their hormones in overdrive after sex ed. class.

Goliano
Goliano

You couldn't get raped if you ran buck naked thru a full to capacity prison yard.

Goliano
Goliano

Your back couldn't support a toddler.

Ugly Model1
Ugly Model1

Not fond of the face, but the body is soft and nice.

Pamela Susan Courson
Pamela Susan Courson

no i'm sorry, it's Goliano who is the MOST dangerous perv out there today.. and I have him on my back.....

Sean
Sean

stunning

Goliano
Goliano

There's a thick line between great ass and no ass.

Mundo
Mundo

Hummmm...Yummmy. I think she's on the borderline of a great ass and no ass at all, but what she does have is good enough for me, her face is not that great, but she'll do...