A Formal Farewell To Amber Heard. Hold Back The Tears, Guys…

So yeah, some of you bastards might still be in a state of mourning following Amber Heard’s crossing of the sexual tracks to Let’s Scissor Land (not that there’s anything wrong with that), but we figured we might as well post a few pics in honor of Amber’s hotness.

The fact that she’s lesbian means that Amber won’t be dating some deep-pocketed douchebag that we’ll have to hate on simply because we’re overflowing with envy. Thanks for showing us the love & coming out of the closet, Amber. We’ll always love you & I’m pretty sure some lonely dudes will still wack off to pics of you online—if that makes you feel any better?

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32 comments
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The Devil
The Devil

It's pretty much the same face, but Scarlett has the eyes and lips and let's be honest, when we're talking about the body, there's no competition.

One is a voluptuous vixen, the other is built like a 12 year old girl.

Ari
Ari

Extremely valid point.

FallenRawToast
FallenRawToast

Not really, sexual orientation has nothing to do with if I enjoy a womans form.

Caitie Harmful
Caitie Harmful

Eh.

Not all my comebacks are winners.

*shrug*

Plus, he's a moron.

Freep
Freep

you just pulled a d55. not cute

McPerv
McPerv

Amber's eyes are sexier, but you can't beat Scarlett's lips.

sandra
sandra

Well I don't know about you but she never looked hotter IMO

horny guy
horny guy

makes me want to go lesbian too

Stephanie
Stephanie

Amber's face is far sexier than Scarlett's.

Caitie Harmful
Caitie Harmful

Wow.

That was a stellar burn. Oooh. You really got me. Ow. My feelings are hurt.

Aren't you that wannabe Hell's Angel that used to skulk around here, talking about wanting to give little girls a candy bar because you can't get any women your own age without using date rape drugs? Did the state let you out after you started cruising junior high schools for girls you could get drunk and diddle? Good for you. I'm glad you're able to come back to your favorite site after your time spent being anally raped in the showers by all the inmates you probably mistook you for an "old lady". That's the biker term for a girlfriend, right? Anyway, I'm glad to see you back. Just do me a favor. Next time you go out for a ride, make sure to not wear a helmet and hit a patch of black ice. Be sure to go realllllyyyyy fast, too! Mmmk? Ok. Now go on, get back to jerking it to pictures of Noah Cyrus.

Oh, BEE-TEE-DUBS (btw)...putting your borderline illiterate ass on ignore. That way, you can spout off as much poorly worded bullshit as you want and not have to worry about me putting your inbred ass in check.

IamLegend_2000
IamLegend_2000

yea & she's sure after your fat ass...right...NOT!

cali-17
cali-17

I was never going to score with this chick anyway (obviously). Now at least she and I have something in common. We can share notes if we run into each other in the airport.

The Devil
The Devil

Bootleg Scarlett Johanssen.

Never saw the appeal.

McPerv
McPerv

Sexual orientation is sort of irrelevant for any woman she wants. She could seduce any woman.

face84
face84

This post this morning made me think she passed away.. lol

wooooo she likes the muffs! lol go amber!!!

face84
face84

Oh it does because shes not interested in male junk! and that my dear will play at your mind p

Freep
Freep

she's staying my #3

My Cock Is Throbbing
My Cock Is Throbbing

Yeah, as long as she continues to get naked on screen her sexual preference doesn't concern me.

Ari
Ari

If that helps you sleep better at night.

Ari
Ari

+ many!

FallenRawToast
FallenRawToast

Straight or Gay, it wasnt like I was going to have a chance at her anyways, so why would her declaration that she is a lesbian make a difference to my enjoying her?

TouchMeOnMyStudio
TouchMeOnMyStudio

why farewell? she just moved houses.

she won't stop to get (half-)naked.

skilligan
skilligan

this only enhances the hotness

Stephanie
Stephanie

She makes me want to go lesbian.

dinodan
dinodan

Still not convinced she is playing exclusively for the other team. I think she is just playing for both teams right now and having fun.

FoyFoy
FoyFoy

pretty much my thoughts exactly.

Boz
Boz

I'm not quite sure what to say...

Caitie Harmful
Caitie Harmful

HAHAHAHAHA.

*pops a bottle of champagne open*

SUCKS TO BE A DUDE.

Hehehehe.

Sweet, sweet Amber meats.

The Headliner
The Headliner

It's all good

I like thespians and she seems to be pretty good at it