Newly Shakira Needs A Date To The Grammys!

Anybody know what Shakira on the Rebound tastes like?

Shakira, boyfriend Antonio de la Rua split after 11 years. They actually split back in August, but the news is just trickling out. Her ex is the son of a former president of Argentina, so if you have plans to pounce on Shakira, you better bring something big to the table (i.e. yachts, jets, a couple billion in the bank, etc).

Their public “breakup note,” signed by both Shakira and Antonio reads, “Our friendship and understanding of one another is unwavering and indestructible.”

Bastardly Translation: We’re temporarily bored of having sex with each other, so we’ll sleep around for a bit with other hot people & then get back together.

Whatever the future holds for these two, the most pressing issue is simply that unless Shakira bags someone over the next couple weeks, she’ll be dateless for the Grammys. Anybody want some Shakira-flavored rebound sex?

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57 comments
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FoxyRoxy
FoxyRoxy

I know, most slang terms for sex or any human bodily functions gross me out more than the actual terms.

salma
salma

oh hell yes THEY ARE A COUPLE, don't know if serious or just friends with benefits but they are together, they have been together since last summer, they met on waka waka video shoot in Barcelona and start dating on the World Cup. She left her boyfriend and he has left his girlfriend, THEY ARE TOGETHER, just wait an see, they will be soon caught by any paparazzi.

Freep
Freep

i forgot who used it first but i want it to catch on for some reason

salma
salma

no one said they are a couple, they are friends with benefits and everyone know Piqué is a manwhore

AlinaMaria
AlinaMaria

I mean the description of it, not the actual act.

FoxyRoxy
FoxyRoxy

I think he means women masturbating.

dahlia
dahlia

Piqué and Shakira are definitely not a couple, even if they waka wakad one or more times last year.

I live in Barcelona and I saw Piqué a few weeks ago in a night club (Sutton) with his girlfriend.

He's so damn hot.

Nookies
Nookies

Not to sound pervy(lol..) But I got semi erect while reading these comments

The Devil
The Devil

Wow, that is extremely accurate.

Angus
Angus

I assume that either he or she wanted to have kids and one of them did not and this led to the breakup.

I am going to go with him probably wanting to get married and have children seeing as he probably wants a political career like his father.

Angus
Angus

His dad ran a whole country, he is not exactly some schlub.

Boz
Boz

5-0!

salma
salma

I got turn on by my own gif

cool

salma
salma

vete a la mierda it's mine

Bowser
Bowser

Is that from a bumper sticker or something?

salma
salma

when a man wants a woman she is a Godess,

when a man has that woman she is ordinary

AlinaMaria
AlinaMaria

Torres is cute, but not in a physical way. Iker FTW!

salma
salma

Fernando Torres, Iker and Piqué, foursome, that would be nice

Freep
Freep

i hear the sound of clams being sawed off in the distance. sounds like its coming from across the Atlantic.

Tapper
Tapper

I'm assuming that after 11 years of being together, there's nothing a man can do to/with Shakira that he hasn't done a million times already. He has my full respect.

My Cock Is Throbbing
My Cock Is Throbbing

If his will isn't strong, he might succumb to alcohol and drugs. I know I might if I lost Shakira pussy.

Cat46
Cat46

you're right, just dating her is a huge acomplishement and dating her for 11 years...I guess we have to show him some respect. Maybe he is great in bed.

Freep
Freep

will never do better...but does he even have to anymore?

Cat46
Cat46

Shakira can do a million times better. Antonio on the other hand...

Cat46
Cat46

I prefer Iker. ;)

Freep
Freep

how do you transition back into society after living on mt. Olympus fucking Aphrodite for 11 years.

TouchMeOnMyStudio
TouchMeOnMyStudio

good lord, he's uber hot.

but wait a moment, wasn't she dating the son of an argentine president for years?

lazydayz
lazydayz

I couldn't care less about celeb relationships but she is fookin hot.

Also, Moe, I think you probably mean "Newly *Single* Shakira Needs a Date to the Grammys!"

salma
salma

Can't help it, I'm Spanish :)

Leni
Leni

woman, you are ALWAYS horny!!!

salma
salma

seriously Bowser, I was mad at you

Now I'm just disappointed

salma
salma

thank you Leni!

TBH I'd do him now

Leni
Leni

to be honest

AlinaMaria
AlinaMaria

I don't think he is all that attractive TBH.

Bowser
Bowser

I wanna have nasty rebound sex with this red hot spinner