Today In Douche Baggery: Chris Brown Compares Himself to Jesus After Frank Ocean Brawl

“Two years ago, Ocean balked when Brown boasted “I f— with Frank Ocean,” to which the former responded with more verbal ammo, comparing the on-and-off beau of Rihanna to Sisqo and Ike Turner.”[THR]

Seriously, will somebody PLEASE tell me what is going on with Chris Brown? Why is this “man” (and I use that term lightly) still allowed to walk freely among decent people? After his attempted murder of Rihanna (let’s not pretend it was anything less) and his many wild and raucous TV appearances in his bid to resuscitate his public image (mission accomplished: NOT!), not to mention his many Twitter feuds with certain female comedy writers where he confesses how much he would like “fart” on them (typically classy), he is now comparing himself to Jesus Christ after an alleged brawl that involved Frank Ocean in the parking lot of a Los Angeles recording studio.

Brown posted a photo on Instagram of the crucifixion, which he captioned with “Painting the way I feel today. Focus on what matters!” Uh huh, because what matters is his own self of aggrandized victimization; it’s always the other person’s fault, isn’t it Chris? (Does this remind anyone of Michael Jackson comparing himself to Nelson Mandela in the middle of one of his child abuse scandals? Don’t be surprised if we end up seeing Chris Brown go the way of MJ).

Ocean is said to be wanting to press charges. Stay tuned to what is sure to be simply the latest in the many episodes of the Downfall of Chris Brown.

And hey, if anyone close to Rihanna is reading this, please make sure she’s safe and that Brown isn’t taking out his frustration on her, if you know what I mean. Seriously.