Britney surprises everyone from friends to her own mommy & gets hitched over the weekend. It must have been one of those spontaneous Britney moments. Now that she is at such an illusionary emotional high, it makes me wonder what kind of drugs she will use on her way down. I’m betting on two: coccaine (b/c she’s a socialite) & excessive amounts of food (b/c she’s southern).
Now I will stage a possible conversation that led to the hick-hitchin’ last night:
Atmosphere: [Watching tv, & eatin’ some chicken dumplins & friend turkaay while smokin’ a pack of Marbrolo Lights]
Kevin “no shoelace” Federline: Baby, I love you so much.
Curiously Clueless Britney: Aaaw, you so sweet. I love you too, babes. Hey, pass me a cig, willya?
Kevin: Hey Brit…uh…uh, you know how you said you’d buy me that new Madden NFL 2005 Game Guide after we get married next month?
Britney: Ya honey bunches. What about it?
Kevin: Uh…uhh…well, Barry and I were playing it the other day & he kept beat me b/c he bought the guide last week.
Britney: So, what you sayin’, Sweety?
Kevin: Well, I was thinkin’ we get married tonight & then I can get my guide tomorrow morning? How does that sound, sexy?
Britney: Yaaay! Let’s do it! Weddings are so much fun! Plus, the press will never be expecting it.
Here’s a photo of Britney w/ the touching look of “I just married the man of my of my life” (in a hick sort of way) on her face.