Author Archives: Moe

Harry Potter ROCKED!!!!

Hello there muggles!!!

I just want to let all of you know that, despite my remsemblance to Mr. Harry Potter himself (hair and glasses) this movie was great!!! The prisoner of Azaban was my favorite HP book and the movie is just sick!!! Its dark and hey it was directed by the one and only guys that directed that mexican porno flick “y tu mama tambien”.

If you have nothing to do go out and watch it!

No Worries, Laker Fans!

Jeez, Detroit Pistons is quite possibly one of the most boring teams in the NBA–then again, what do you expect from the East & Michigan?! Not only that, I think their boredom is contagious and therefore put the poor Lakers to sleep. It was a painful game to watch, I tell you. One guy shoots 80+% and the rest of the team?–25%. Seriously, guys. GO INTO SHAQ! I know the guys on the floor aren’t smartest bunch from math class in high school, but that should be a very simple conclusion! BUT I guess, if Detriot infects the game, the stadium and the overall aura of the game w/ their toxic boredom, it will make it difficult for the Lakers who are synonymous w/ the words energy & flashiness to get the ball into the Hungry Big Man.

All I know is that the Lakers must play their game. Tonight they did not play their game. They roamed around the court, shot as the shot-clock buzzer neared 0, played no D & talked no trash. Those are all key elements of scoring 60-70 points in the first half, not the entire game!

They will brush it off. They partied it up for the 7 days they were off after their win against the Minisuckota.

All you Laker-Haters, enjoy the next few hours because the ring will be ours…again.

Love or Stupidity?

You’d think this kid was getting a Ph.D or possibly a celebration party for discovering the cure to some rare disease, but no, he was graduating bloody high school. Who the hell cannot graduate high school these days?! It was in a huge hall that could seat around 1000, with amazing audio, lines of tables for the myriad of guests, and a SHIT LOAD of food (it almost sounds like I’m describing a lu’au or something)! The food was ok, but the Baklava at the end was the highlight, in my opinion. All in all, I think the parents must have dropped around $5k minimum. I would have taken that money and cruised around the world, but this was not me. What I’m trying to say is that there are more ways to blow $5k than a fucking party w/ a bunch of old people who you don’t even know. For example, when I walked in, I congratulated about 5 wrong kids before I got to the one that was actually graduating. It was kind of funny, actually. Anyway, bottom line: this kid got a lot of gifts.

Now, moving on to why I think this was especially overdone. They had a singer for one thing. They had the community priest plant the seed of fear in this guy’s heart–telling him to make the right friends, being a good muslim, etc etc.. Then, there was a guy who read verses out of the Quran. That’s not all. After those people, we had to suffer through 3 more speakers who gave these corny, heartfelt speeches about this kid and how smart, witty, humorous, etc etc etc etc he is and how he will be greatly missed (he’s going to a state school about 1.5hrs away, for God’s sake). I swear, if I had randomly walked into the hall while one of these people were talking, I’d think I was at a funeral or something. There was just so much love! God have mercy!

Personality Type: The Lazy Bastard

God, just went through an extremely busy day today. Haven’t had much time to do anything today except my latest Personality Type.

FYI to people: Mainly Melissa & Brian- You guys want to hit up Hawaii this summer or what? Preferably sometime in August. I think tix will be cheaper. Oh yeah, Melissa, James is staying in a killer house all summer. I want to try to get a lot of people to go so the trip will be worth it. I just don’t want to be standing around all alone while ChanMan works the mojo on his women. Also, if I do go, I’m going to splurge and do my first skydiving session (if it doesn’t cost me like $500–$300 is my personal limit. This includes a video, God damn it! I am Indian, so I naturally expect more.)

Now, for my Lazy Bastard Personality Type! Behold!

I know this person who’s so damn lazy. This guy has the typical Lazy Bastard Personality. There are plenty of these people in the US, w/ especially a heavy-heavy concentration in the South for some odd reason. It must be all the buttered-up biscuits, slow moving gravy and deep-fried chicken that make these people so damn lethargic in mind & motion!

GOAT MEAT PRICES RISING!!

Yes the delicate meat prices are rising and have been rising since the madcow scare! Those Commies! Anyway, let me share with you some of the junk I read @ times. Here’s a gold analyst spouting (is this a word?) out about why he thinks gold will hit $480 and then move up to $1000+. Well, here’s an excerpt from Jim Sinclair’s June 1st commentary on gold prices:*

LAKERS DIE!!!!

I CANNOT comprend how you are my friend Moe. I think I cried last night because the T-Wolves lost. No, not because Minnasota is my favorite team, its mainly because I fuckin HATE the lakers.

I hope one day I will be walking down the street with a dozen bricks and it just so happens that Dick Fox, Kobe Bry’can’t’, dumb Derrek Fisher, RETARDED (literally) Shaq, lame-ass Devin George, Karl "I’m too old (look at the grey hairs on my gotee) to play basketball so I just bully everyone" Malone, Gary "I suck" Payton, and Kareem "I will never be the most famous Kareem in basketball" Rush all walk by so I can throw those bricks at their knees. Yeah, of course you win basketball games when you buy players. Duh.

Minisuckota Rushed by Lakers!

There is a tragedy in being a Lakers fan and living on the east cost. One tragedy is simply the lack of other Laker fans in the South for the good ‘ol reminiscing about the great championships of the past & the second tragedy is the more obvious timezone issue. The 3-hr differential simply does not suit my work schedule! I was up until 12am watching the Lakers run over Minnesota. I have to admit, I was a little scared in the 3rd quarter, but thank God, Kareem Rush came up huge w/ his six 3-pointers. It was luck, God damn it, but winning championship year after year after year takes a little luck, along with a tremendous amount of skill. Minisuckota has the skill, but simply needs more luck. Maybe next year they can get to game 7? Or possibly spend $300 million & bring hall-of-fame players to compliment Lattrell & KG?

As for ‘Soul Plane,’ I was unable to watch it yesterday. Things came up beyond my control, so I was forced to postpone until later this week (hopefully Saturday). I’m kind of glad because I didn’t really want to watch the movie w/ a bunch of rowdy Southerners on a holiday weekend anyway. So yes, you will have to wait for my full review of this epic.

Beauty @ the 'Soul Plane' Premiere

Today, I will catch the matinee show, but for now I will leave you guys with some HOT photos taken at the Premiere. These are just some of my favs:
First, we have our main man, Snoop, sporting his Gangsta Pilot Suit. No, he didn’t wear this to the premiere. This was just a cool photo I decided to pop in. I know, I know. I’m losing a lot of of my credibility in choosing movies by pushing this film so much, but screw it. People will soon see. True threatre comes alive when people act with the intent to entertain their audience—not shock them with the blatant glamorization of murderous, mythical heroes (i.e. Troy) or of course, rely on computer generated flicks b/c modern actors simply don’t cut it (i.e. Shrek 2—I know I’d like this movie if I saw it, but I’m trying to prove a point make).*

My Hick Life…

Truly sad, I tell you. I learned to edge my lawn today. I never thought it come to this, but yes, I edged my lawn to perfection, God damn it! I used a powerful Black & Decker edger that caught the eye of some of my hick neighbors who were also tolling away in their robot lives w/ de-weeding, lawn mowing, & random garden upgrades. One guy even came over and checked out my edger. I won’t go into our exciting conversation. Anyway, now all I need to do is buy a Ford F150, get one of those lame wood carriages that look like they’re about to come off of trucks and hit other cars on the freeway (you people in cities probably have no clue what I’m talking about), buy a hardcore lawn mower and lastly, drive around cutting other peoples’ lawn through the guise of my own lawn mowing business.

Ok change of topic… *

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