Category Archives: Bikini Pics

Mariah Carey Striking Lame Poses On The Beach

Some people (mostly crazy, ass-sucking Mariah fans) say she’s shooting a music video, but that’s just a rumor. In fact, the reality of these pictures has a funny twist, my friends.

Apparently, upon spotting cameras (especially those owned by members of the paparazzi), Mariah goes into a trance & typically dives, head first, into one of her all-exclusive Posing Zones.

Case in point…

The Socialite Sex Trade: Kelly Slater, Gisele Bundchen & Leo DiCraps

Leo Deecraps, after getting a little tired of sexin’ up Giselle 24-hours a day (don’t blame him) & has successfully passed her on to surfer, Kelly Slater. Damn you, Kelly Slater & damn the manwhorish life of surfers all around the globe. I am ridiculously envious.

Although Giselle Bundchen is an amazingly hot package & a longtime member of the Socialite Sex Trade, I would still swing for the innocent, yet scandalously sexy, Petra Nemcova. Maybe Leo recently saw his calendar & astutely noticed that it’s been around a year since the Asian Tsunami & Petra Nemcova might be finished overcoming the tragic loss of her beloved fiancé, Simon Atlee. Watch for Leo to go in for the kill b/c obviously none of the other rich dudes in his age group are interested in super hot women younger than the age of 30. What has the world come to?

Below you’ll find a few pics of Ms. Bundchen modeling Ipanema Sandals (Hello Mag Story). Have mercy.

Insect Richie & Mischa Barton

I gotta admit, I’m usually not into Mischa Boxface, but she’s lookin’ mighty skinny & hot in these pics! All girls should weight 23lbs & wear sexy bikinis!

What’s the scoop with these two chicks anyway? It’s possible Mischa’s tapping Nicole for some consulting services before purchasing a new pair of shades…? Or maybe this is just some sad excuse for a photo-op?

Regardless, here are a few more snaps.

The Poolside Ass Exercises Trend. Ow!

I’m really loving this budding trend. Let’s hope a lot of this type of stuff happens in Costa Rica while I’m cruising around from town to town.

As for the photos, I don’t know about Caprice Bourett, but I’m pretty sure Tony Parker is away @ some basketball camp or something b/c Eva really looks like she’s trying to attract a sexual partner or two to help suppress her voracious appetite for sweaty balls & abnormally large schlongs. Don’t tell me that Eva managed to con Tones into another one of those sex only, open relationships? What a genius of a hottie!! I want a piece too, God damn it!!

Ok, here are a few scandalous photos of both women. Which pool are these two at, damn it!?

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