Category Archives: Bikini Pics

Easter Trend: Grab an Ugly Bikini & Head to the Beach

So yeah, our good friend TheChef (I’ve heard his special pasta sauce can bring women to orgasm1…just a rumor, though) writes,

Now normally, I absolutely love Scarlett’s look. She’s hot, down to earth and smokes the shmokey shmoke. But this picture is terrible. She still looks pretty good, but…. That bikini she’s got on is horrible. I expect better next time ScarJo. Dammit! [The Thingamablog—remember to bookmark this shiznit!]

We gotta agree. But if I was ever trapped in a room w/ both Kelly Clarkson & Scarlett Johansson, I’d run to Scarlett’s corner w/out even a second thought.

Bastardly Suggestion: Kelly Clarkson needs implants, along w/ a personal trainer. FAST!

Here are pics of both women from over the weekend…

1. Girls: TheChef is married, but he can be reached from his blog for “personal consultations.”

Bastardly Midnight Snack: Scarlett Johansson In A Bikini. Damn You, Josh Harnett!!

The couple, who are rarely pictured together, were soaking up the sun at the exclusive Goldeneye resort in Jamaica. [Mirror]

At least Scarlett’s in the sun trying to get some color on those bags of love. A for effort, baby!

As for the Mr. Harnett: I’m pretty sure this session of water wrestling was just foreplay, so good for him! And, judging by Scarlett’s calm demeanor in public (i.e. when a gay, fat man grabbed her boobs on national television, Scarlett simply laughed it off), chances are pretty damn good that Scarlett’s one kinky kitty when the doors are closed, the lights are dimmed and the boobs are released from their cage.

All we can do is keep our fingers & toes crossed & hope they’re stupid enough to make a sex video…

Mariah Carey Striking Lame Poses On The Beach

Some people (mostly crazy, ass-sucking Mariah fans) say she’s shooting a music video, but that’s just a rumor. In fact, the reality of these pictures has a funny twist, my friends.

Apparently, upon spotting cameras (especially those owned by members of the paparazzi), Mariah goes into a trance & typically dives, head first, into one of her all-exclusive Posing Zones.

Case in point…

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