Category Archives: Completely Useless

This Week’s Funniest News: Mischa Barton Held A Press Conference About Herself

Photo Credit: FameFlynet Pictures

Let’s lead with the obligatory HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

We’ll keep this very short because we know (at least that’s our assumption) that very few, if any, of you guys actually give a shit about Mischa Barton. Believe it or not, but these photos were snapped a couple days back as Mischa and her lawyer Lisa Bloom held a press conference at the Bloom Law Firm in Woodland Hills to discuss how Mischa is a victim of revenge porn by her ex-boyfriend. The dude is apparently trying to sell a video of Mischa doing naughty things behind closed doors. Her lawyer got a cease and desist order and let every one know that if you try to purchase or use the videos and/or photos you will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law. Let’s face it, this video will get bought at some point, but it’s just a matter of how much Mischa wants to get paid.

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Ariel Winter Shows Off Her New Regrettable Back Tattoo; Tigers & Lions Are In Style!

Winter is here! Ariel Winter shows off a new back tattoo in a super short chambray dress for a waxing appointment in West HollywoodPhoto Credit: Pacific Coast News

The somewhat freaky “Modern Family” actress Ariel Winter
was spotted out & about on Wednesday afternoon wearing a dangerously tiny denim dress that showed off a new tattoo on her back of a tiger. The crazy amount of detail on that tiger almost makes it look like one of those sticker tats that you peel off, but when you consider the amount of cash Ariel is swimming in these days, it wouldn’t surprise me at all if she coughed up thousands for the tat.

According to the nosy papz, the 18-year-old was heading to a waxing appointing in West Hollywood and then ended her day at a Burbank music studio. Wait, don’t tell me that even Ariel’s taking a stab at launching a music career?!

Winter is here! Ariel Winter shows off a new back tattoo in a super short chambray dress for a waxing appointment in West HollywoodPhoto Credit: Pacific Coast News

Playboy Mansion For Sale….Only $200 Million! Will Neighbor Sean Parker Bite?

Playboy Mansion For Sale 2015 1Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News

It was rumored late last week that the famous Playboy Mansion would go on sale in the coming days and earlier this morning, the property was officially listed for a whopping $200 million (source: TMZ)! The fact that it’s listed for such a stupidly high number means A) they don’t want tourists rolling up in their rented Mustang convertibles for an open house tour & B) the focus is on the 0.0001%.

Obviously, the listing agents have big money in their eyes, even though TMZ’s real estate sources have a $90 million price tag on the property. Even that price is pretty crazy, but possibly not too crazy if you happen to be a tech billionaire!

Lucky for Hef, his very next door neighbor is none other than former Facebook president Sean Parker, who’s currently worth somewhere around $3 billion (probably mostly in FB stock). Sean coughed up around $55 million for the 2.3 acre property next door, also known as the Brody House (he bought this property from Ellen DeGeneres who made a cool $15 million after owning it for only six months!). Even if Sean doesn’t bite on the extra six acres, I’m sure one of his billionaire friends wouldn’t mind bagging the property (for bragging rights), so it’ll be interesting to see who ends up owning the Playboy Mansion in a few months. While I’m a little skeptical about the $200 million, the slimy agents might just be using the old “ask for a lot & back off” trick. My range for the final selling price is $100-125 million.

Yup, There’s Even A R2-D2-Themed ‘Star Wars’ Airplane

The 'Star Wars' Cast Touches Down At Gatwick In Their R2-D2 Decorated PlanePhoto Credit: FameFlynet Pictures

I guess marketers literally thought of everything ahead of the big ‘Star Wars : The Force Awakens’ release! An R2-D2-decorated airplane was seen landing at Gatwick Airport earlier today shuttling the cast to their next premiere event.

The film’s production budget was around $200 million, but I’m sure that doesn’t include marketing-related expenses. Let’s face it, the film will probably go on to earn upwards of $2 billion in worldwide box-office, licensing & merchandise sales, so leasing an airplane for a few months is literally chump change. Ahh, you gotta love Hollywood!

The 'Star Wars' Cast Touches Down At Gatwick In Their R2-D2 Decorated PlanePhoto Credit: FameFlynet Pictures

Hashtag KillMeNow! The Kim Kardashian Video Game Is As Awful As Expected

Because nothing says ‘Gamer’ like the name ‘Kim Kardashian’, the celeb with endless ways to self-market her way into every conceivable industry has launched her own video game called (as you would expect) “Kim Kardashian: Hollywood”.

The game takes players on a journey from being a lowly supermarket clerk to becoming a Hollywood A-lister. As you can imagine, it doesn’t require any discernible talent.

The free game is available for your iPhone. Also free is your ability to lament for Italian plumbers and their Mushroom sidekicks.

Top 50 Restaurants Frequented by Celebs

celebrities-hanging-harlem
Photo NY Daily News

“The list includes restaurants and cafes in Atlanta, Boston, Charleston, Chicago, Las Vegas, Los Angeles, Miami, New York, and Washington D.C.”[HuffPo]

Want to have dinner next to Halle Berry? How about dessert with one of the cast of Orange Is the New Black? Of course you do!

Check out this super awesome/amazing list of the top eateries most often frequented by celebrities. Then call, make a reservation, and prepare to selfie the hell out of James Franco.

Calling All Meat Lovers! Myla Sinanaj Releases New Sex Tape Called ‘The Anti-Kim’

**EXCLUSIVE** Myla Sinanaj, seen here on the Jersey Shore in May, has released a sex tape called 'The Anti-Kim'

These are old photos that were snapped back in May on the Jersey Shore as Myla modeled the latest in the Poolside Collection swimwear, first made famous by ‘Teen Mom’-turned porn star Farrah Abraham.

I guess since Myla Sinanaj dated douchebag Kris Humphries following his 72 day marriage with Kim Kardashian, she thought people would want to watch her in action, as well. She reportedly screened Kim’s tape while filming her own and possibly even consulted with Kim’s sex tape director Kris Jenner (who probably made a few bucks on the side in the process).

So, who’s gonna watch this thing?

Did Pedo-Pimp Doug Hutchison Hire Somebody Else To Spice Up His Sex Life?

Courtney Stodden and husband Doug Hutchison seen leaving Chateau Marmont in West Hollywood

For those of you who don’t know these people, Courtney Stodden is famous for two things: 1) marrying 51-year-old actor Doug Hutchison (he’s 53 now) when she was just 16 & 2) looking like a prostitute whenever out in public.

These two lovebirds were seen out enjoying the nightlife in West Hollywood last night as they made a flashy exit from Chateau Marmont. It seems like there was an event there last night because a number of celebs were seen leaving from there, but any event that’s attended by Pedo-Pimp Doug Hutchison & his plastic-sex-toy Courtney Stodden is somewhat questionable.

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