Category Archives: Babes

Brooke Burke Is Burger King's Muse/Whore

I’m curious to find out how far Brooke’s willing to go w/ this new gig b/c honestly, this type of campaign is career suicide. Then again, there’s not much else going on in Brooke Burke’s career, so this could be a way for her to reinvent herself…could be.

Here are a few more pics from their delicious date.

Adrianne Curry Does Playboy Magazine In February 2006

Adrianne Curry is currently known for 3 things:

1. Red carpet camera whoring
2. Top Model winner
3. Current nesting grounds for Peter Brady’s penis

Now, Ms. Curry can add Playboy to that scandalous list b/c in February’s issue she crossed the sacred line. W/ this line-crossing, Disney has officially closed its innocent doors to her boney ass, while the porn industry’s wide-open doors are only a few, short steps away (the “few, short stepsâ€? include (Steps 1 & 2) a couple bad career moves & (Step 3) a crazy night filled with drugs & alcohol; step 4, of course, involves the actual act in which she will get in front of a camera & attempt to physically bear a drug-induced invasion of a 12â€? sexual-missile belonging to some dude named Black Stallion).

With those sweet words in hand, check out a couple of the tamer pics from her layout. To view the entire set (in all its naked glory), you must download the zipfile over here. Please leave The Bastardly before performing any wanking activities.

Sandra Sanchez – A Bastardly Interview

Photos courtesy of Sandra Sanchez

Sandra Sanchez is the reason I’ve contacted my local cable company to get Fuel TV. In addition to The Daily Habit and NuMuTu on Fuel TV you’ll catch the lovely Sandra working the red carpet on the Starz! network smoozing it up with Hollywood’s A-listers. Get yourself more acquainted with Sandra in that Bastardly way we do and check her out at!!!

Alicia Keys Looking Wankably Sexy On TRL

I know, I know. It’s totally unfair for me to compare Mariah & Alicia…

Alicia Keys is modeling what a healthy, hot woman should look like. I remember that just a few months back she was decked out in leather and looking super chubs, but thankfully she has parted ways w/ Janet Jackson since then. Ok, I’m being being.

For the record, I haven’t a full episode of TRL since that time a stoned/drunk Liam Gallagher showed up on the set & just stared out into Times Square while Carson Daly tried to conduct some sort of lame interview. I’m sure some of you will remember it.

Jessica Simpson's Wardrobe Malfunction Malfunctioned


At the People’s Choice Awards a couple nights back, J. Simpson had a chance to rescue her dying career (in the short term, of course), but her dress failed to malfunction as planned (by her father/pimp, Joe Simpson).

I mean, a couple more inches, we would’ve had a nipple shot & if you add a couple more inches on top of the nipple shot, we would’ve been cruising deep inside Tara Reid Territory. I’m sure a couple kids back in some shady Chinese sweatshop in the ghettos of Old Shanghai will take the fall for the non-malfunction of her planned wardrobe malfunction (if that makes any sense).

Luisana Lopilato & Her Mysterious, Horny Greek Connection

Perverted connection would also work. Luisana has won the hearts of every male under the age of 14 in Greece. They apparently want to rip her clothes off and do very naughty things to her.

We will review a few comments on our other Luisana posts that you can find here, here, and also here.

But before I plug a few horny comments by Greek nationals, check out this comment by a confused & concerned (about Luisana) visitor.

Ok, I first came across the Bastardly 3 months ago and have been irritated by the stupidity of many people on here… however, this is the first time I couldn’t resist commenting, and I apologize if this gets lengthy. First of all, where do you greeks learn your english??? Jeez, and I thought asians were bad. Why don’t you just stick to your native tongue? I understand that English is difficult to learn, but I’ve met 5-year old autistic kids that make more sense than all of you. Secondly, are there no therapists in Greece for you little perverts to go see about your sick and unnnatural obsession with this poor girl? IT’S CREEPY. I hope none of you are visiting the USA anytime soon… but if you are please let me know so I can starve my Rottweiler for a couple days in case you creeps come around with your unrealistic infatuations and peek in my windows. Maybe I’m being an ignorant American but if I was this “Louisianaâ€? chick (or whatever her name is… I’ve never heard of her) I would definitely NEVER visit Greece, despite it’s beauty, for fear that a bunch of 16-year old boys with multiple STDs would chase me down and rape me… all while stuffing Spanakopeta down my throat. [Original Doll]

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