Category Archives: Babes

Teri Hatcher Too Old For Whoring Business

I feel like I’m too old to just have sex. I mean, I want to have sex, but with somebody who really loves and gets me. [Ireland Online]

Aaaaw. Isn’t that sweet? Teri wants to have a respectable relationship. By dropping the ‘long-term bomb’, Teri is now in stuck in a sexual hole all by herself. Why? Well…

1. 75% of the rich men in Hollywood have blacklisted her MILFy ass
2. Another 5% busily watch Teri demonstrate S Factor’s stripper moves on the Howard Stern show in order to contemplate whether she’s worth the trouble.
3. The remaining 20% are now scheming sleazy ways to get into Teri’s panties.

Any woman who can move her body like Teri should have men crawling all over her, but I guess she’s well aware of that fact.

Any bets on who this Michael Jackson look-alike (per miSs) & hot MILF (per me) will end up with? I say she’ll soon slap some sense into Jesse Metcalfe & hook up with him—long-term. The Old-Woman, Young Boy Syndrome is alive & well, baby!

The Women Of Foreign (Latino) Television

Barbara Bermudo

Barbara Bermudo

It’s no secret that the United States has the most screwed-up & hypocritical censorship bureau in the world, but when did censorship have any correlation with hotness (also known as female exploitation)? We see she-males like Mr. Gretta van Sustern, straight-up annoying bitches like Paula Zahn, & on top of those two, we have 300-yr old, Judy Woodruff. And, that’s just one network, my friends.

Why can’t we learn from our Mexican neighbors & follow the lead of great Spanish institutions like Univision & Telemundo? Why must we favor content (useless content most of the time, mind you) over presentation?

Below is a compilation of beauties from various North American-based Latino canales! Savor the beauty & write to your local stations demanding an increase in their hotness level!

Aida Yespica Knows How to Dress

Well, let’s see her stats:

* She’s 23.
* Born in Caracas, Venezuela
* Once crowned Ms Amazonian (you know that’s gotta be competitive!)
* Slept with R&B manwhore/player, Craig David
* Down right sexy

Yes, Craig David was lucky enough to get a piece of Aida once.

She is a gorgeous girl. And, boy – what a body! It was fine for a while, but it was never going to progress as she didn’t speak much English. She is the most amazing girl I’ve ever seen. She’s incredible. Most guys fall on their knees in front of her. [Craig David, The Mirror]

How did these two sexual animals ever meet?! Let’s go to Aida for this one, kiddies.

He had a fantastic body and knew exactly how to make a woman happy. He was tender, but also full of passion and I was mesmerized. I knew Craig had a song called Seven Days about meeting a girl one day, having a drink with her another and making love by Wednesday. Well, let’s just say he was a good two days ahead of his own song that night – and I had absolutely no complaints.

Ok, fucking Craig David is the man. If the Aida’s last statement wasn’t enough, this next one by Craig should do the trick.

I was going to have to learn Spanish and work out if she had a sense of humour. It was a case of another one bites the dust. I’m single again. I don’t know what’s going on there, but it’s kind of fun being 22 and not being in a serious relationship. I travel around and meet lots of people. I’ve seen some amazing girls and met people who have great personalities who I haven’t been physically attracted to. I want to find that fine balance, but it’s about personality over looks every time. That will keep you interested – someone who can make you laugh.

There you go, Girls. Craig David favors personality over looks. Bastard.

Now, let’s get back to the scandalous nature of Aida’s dress (or whatever it is that she’s wearing).

Victoria Beckham's Crazy Ass Recovery!

Photo: Bauer-Griffin

Since D. Beckham has crossed the Bastardly Wires, I gotta plug the wifie.

Victoria Beckham: You either masturbate to her or you hate her. There’s no gray area. She may be a cocky, arrogant bitch, but we must commend her for looking like she does just a few weeks after her pregnancy. It’s literally amazing.

She should make a video of her recovery & sell it to women around the world. Their husbands will appreciate it.

Then again, since Poshy Victoria has been under the scandalous scalpel, I’m sure she had a little work done behind closed doors. Just don’t expect her skipping around in her skimpy, Versace bikini anytime soon.

Jessica Alba's New Do

Did Jessica Alba lose a horrible bet or something?? Dude, rather than getting her bloody hair dyed dark, she went and chopped it off. Even though she’s still super hot & I wouldn’t mind a few nights by her side (with proper protection, of course), she just dropped major pointage in my ratings. When will girls realize that the short-blondie look is OUT! Shit, that was out like 2 years ago.

Jessica, buy a wig or something. If not a wig, at least do Playboy to compensate for the bad hair.

Melania Trump Showin’ Off The Married Nipple! Ow!

Melania_Trump_Duplex_207Photo Credit: Own the rights to these photos? Please contact us immediately.

Donald should really look over his woman before letting her step out the door. The two lovebirds are pictured below @ the opening of Donny’s new Veranda (Designer Penthouses For Pimps).

Props go to Melania Trump’s designer for making scandalous clothing that provide Donald easy nipple access in those ‘oh-so-boring’ limo rides.

Vanity Fair Oscar Party, ArrivalsPhoto Credit: FameFlynet Pictures

Read more

Liz Hurley's New Beachwear Line

Liz Hurley with her Indian Billionaire-Boytoy, Arun Nayar, @ Harrods in London. She was busy showing off her new beachwear line.

First off, I love Liz Hurley not only because she’s absolutely beautiful, but b/c she’s sleeping w/ an Indian man. Yo go girl! More sexy models need to sleep with Indian men.

Now, let’s plug her newly released goods. In an interview w/ NY Times, Liz talks about the tough business of modeling beachwear.

I was so self-conscious then. It took me six years to be comfortable modeling a swimsuit. Now modeling is kind of like eating apples. It’s not splitting the atom, you know? [NY Times]

1 3,674 3,675 3,676 3,677 3,678 3,682