S&M Princess To Wed Trousersnake!

Too hot/cold to handle!
Do you like it Hot or Cold?! Cammy likes both, baby!

Cammy & Justin seem to be falling into the trap of commitment. Just a couple months after Cameron spouted out to Us Weekly how she didn’t like the idea marriage (or something ot that effect), it’s been reported that she & Michael Jackson-wannabe, Justin ‘Trousersnake’ Timberlake, are protecting their personal assets w/ prenuptials. Yes girls, if you’re wondering, Justy dropped thousands @ Tiffany’s & then later dropped to propose. Once again, I don’t like the idea of marrying a woman who likes to ice her nipples while staring in S&M movies, as well as marrying a man (if I swung that way) who’s adorned with scandalous nickname of ‘Trousersnake’ throughout the worldwide club scene.

The UK’s fab tab, The Sun, claims this marriage will probably “be more like that of Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin, nice and discreet.” Ok, since The Sun is a world renowned tab known for it’s scandalous (my personal favorite) Page 3, we’ll let that comment slide. The truth of the matter is simply that this marriage will absolutely not be discreet, but it might be nice. Unless they perform the ceremony in their own living room, you can expect to see photos plastered all over the web (along w/ horrible commentary like this).

Now for the real issue on hand…Britney must feel a sharp sting on her growing chineck every time she picks up a tab now that Justin has bagged the ultimate treat in Cammy. For one thing, Brit has excessive amounts of acne—yes, very gross. Secondly, she already has bloody step children (or is that step child? Who really knows anyway, right?) ! Talk about a turn of fate! I have to admit, though, Justin has indeed pulled ahead—he’ll have especially pulled ahead when Britney gets her divorce later in 2005 (while she’s pregnant with Kev’s 10th child, mind you). We don’t like the Brit situation at all, but hey, she’s good at diggin’ her white-trash holes.

Now a hot photo of Cameron on the next page.

Just Keep It Real…

Excerpt from this article in regards to the civil suit against Kobe.

“she was bent over the chair and forced by defendant Bryant to remain in that position, defendant Bryant sexually assaulted and raped plaintiff, by unlawfully and knowingly inflicting sexual intrusion and penetration of her vagina against her will and without her consent.”

I guess that’s the PC way of saying “he bent the whore over the chair and did her doggie.”

The Tragedy of Kobe Bryant

Vanessa Laine reacts:“I know that my husband has made a mistake — the mistake of adultery.

He and I will have to deal with that within our marriage, and we will do so. He is not a criminal. I know that he did not commit a crime & he did not assault anyone except me, but I will have the last laugh!

He is a loving and kind husband and father. I believe in his innocence.”

Translation of a smart woman’s (Vanessa Laine) reaction: “My fucking husband is a lying, cheating bastard who committed the biggest sin: Adultery. He will pay in hell, but first, he will pay (me) on earth.

He will pay for this & I will make him pay for this within our marriage. Mark my words, he will pay. He is not a criminal, ok. He is just a lying bastard. I know that he did not commit a crime & he did not assault anyone except me, but I will have the last laugh! He is a rich NBA player with millions of dollars today and millions more to be earned tomorrow. He knows he cheated & the entire world knows he cheated, but that doesn’t mean he enjoys rough sex! Cheating & rough sex have no correlation. Money & Diamonds do.

First & foremost, he is rich NBA player who has millions in the bank. On the side, he’s also a rich father & husband who has millions in the bank. I will wring him of every damn Karat he can afford. I do not need to believe he has millions in the bank. I know he does.”

ok-ok, I’m being a little mean.

As we all know, Kobe & Vanessa Laine share the most awkward relationship that is bound to be over within the next 5 years (or until Vanessa gets bored of juicing Kobe of his money). Kobe committed one of the worst acts while in wedlock, yet Vanessa Laine remains unflinchingly loyal. Confused? Is it just me or is our society really fucked up @ times. Whatever it is, it’s pure comedy. Here are some photos snapped recently in L.A…

Before we get to the photos, a heartfelt letter to ball-hog Kobe.

Hiromi Oshima – Before Playboy

Part time correspondant Varian Gray has made us privy to his plethora of knowledge in regards to Playboy Centerfold Hiromi Oshima. Read his previous comments from this post.

I’d like to say that he has been gracious enough to tell us about how he’d previously been in a serious relationship with Hiromi and how she “left him because of fame and fortune with Playboy.” That’s some fucked up shit, I tell you! Varian was also gracious enough to tell us that her amazing breasts are indeed real….YES!!! However, that sweet girl from Tokyo that he met years ago is no more. Varian, it’s some fucked up shit what she did to you…we could rip on her under the generalization of girls who leave guys for the BBD (Bigger Better Deal) but we’ll leave that to you if you wanna vent out how much of a pain in the ass she is/was.

This is in no way a site dedicated to her hotness. But indeed it is a post that allows you readers a chance to see what she looked like before Playboy snatched her away from Varian.

Varian Gray and Hiromi Oshima

…as Varian mentioned in an earlier post of his, check out one of his favorite movies, “Different Strokes 15: Bad Ass Bikini Babes”. Go to your nearest Castle Megastore and find a copy today!


[Update]: Please make sure to check out the next post in our series on Hiromi Oshima.

The James Chan…Part Deux

If you missed the first cameo by The James Chan, please refer here.

Episode 7…special guest star Shooter “I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast” McGavin as Nicole’s father.

Alright ladies…now to the goodies. Yes ladies, our favorite James is back for another cameo appearance on North Shore. I’m going to have say that it wasn’t as awesome an appearance as the previous. But ladies!…yes, he does have his shirt off in the few scenes were you know that it truly is The James Chan…

Awesome Back Musckles!
Oh yes ladies, you might only see him from behind, but you know that’s your favorite James Chan!

Rear deltoid
…don’t even bother with Gabriel…it’s The James Chan that you want to stare at.

Look at that aweome 12 pack of abs….ladies, he will wash your shirt on that fo’ veddy cheap!

Tricep and Rear deltoid
Sorry ladies…but The James Chan has retired from his North Shore cameo appearances…here’s the final shot of his fine acting work don.

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