Tag Archives: Natalie Pinkham

MoeJackson Run-on Sentence Review: Black Swan

Go watch “Black Swan” tonight!!

After failing to hit the 11:45 PM, 12:15, & 12:36 AM show times, we finally caught the 12:45 AM showing which ended around 2:40 in the morning, so naturally, it wasn’t the best time to watch such a mentally draining film like “Black Swan,” but nevertheless, as I’ve stated previously, my personal test for great films is to dive into them late at night because regardless of my level of exhaustion, if the film tells a great story, I’ll somehow stay awake and if it sucks ass, I’ll catch up on some much needed sleep, so yeah, with regards to “Black Swan,” let’s just say Natalie Portman will win an Oscar for Best Actress b/c she literally has everything going for her in this film: 1. She makes the audience believe that she’s a totally fucked-up, professional ballerina, 2. She gets eaten out on camera, 3. She masturbates on camera (once in front of her mom), 4. She makes out with Mila Kunis like an animal, and just for icing on the Academy Award Cake, 5. She’s a Jewish Harvard University graduate, so there you have it, the film is a showcase of cracked-out craziness from all angles b/c you might need to watch it a couple times to totally figure out what the fuck is going on or maybe I was too tired (or stupid) to completely follow all the shit that went down, but it’s definitely on my Holiday Must Watch list—especially for those of you bastards who love Mila Kunis…aaaaah, Mila Kunis–as avid Mila fans, let’s hope she gets honored for Best Supporting Actress b/c what’s the point of eating out someone on camera if you’re gonna get rewarded?!