Monthly Archives: July 2004

Vegas Baby Vegas

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Ahh, I love vacation time in Vegas…the casinos, the bars, the lounges, and especially the strip clubs make Vegas an amazing place. But dude, since the last time i was there, the “slim shady”ness of the tipping scheme has increased 20 fold. Everywhere I went, I was asked to tip them for better service, seats, drinks, ladies, entrance, and so forth. At the clubs, the bouncers want to be tipped for front of the line access, and even at the strip clubs, the b0uncers want to be tipped so you can get a good close seat to the stage. I swear, I probably spent up to $150 in just tipping alone in Vegas. Sure, I got in earlier, and my seat at the titty bar was sort of close, but do you all think it’s actually worth it? I am a man of customer service, but dude, paying for a better seat at the titty bar, that is just going too far.

Musical Confessions

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The Ganja!
This photo’s purpose is to grab your attention (it succeeded). Marrymejuana is bad. If you see it lying around, burn it in a pipe while inhaling (once you’ve inhaled the smoke, hold your breath for your own safety). (I’m kidding! DRUGS ARE BAD & THEY KILL, but far less than alcohol & heart disease.)

Somehow the ‘Miseducation of Lauryn Hill’ ended up in my car—there are some classics in there, I tell you. To tell you the truth, I’ve never really listened to the entire CD, mainly because I catch on to trends FAR after they’ve passed. It’s not that I try to miss them or anything. I think my tastes are just slow to mature. Anyway, there is one wicked song in there— I think it’s track #7 or 8, but the lyrics go: “you can get the powah, you can get the monay, but just remembah: the last owah.” (owah = hour.) I don’t know if it’s the lyrics or the music, but it’s a sweet song.

Also, a couple of my Nirvana CDs have dug themselves back up to the surface, as well. By far, my favorite song is ‘Dumb.’ It’s so short that I have to repeat it like 10 times to have enough.

My Musical Confession (you bastards should do one, as well)
I was in India most of the 80s & was still Indian in the mind until the early-mid-90s (meaning I listened to no music & spoke fobby English) UNTIL, that is, I signed up to Columbia House one day in the 7th grade w/ one of my friends. I don’t remember if my friend made me sign up or if we both signed together, but I know for sure that Columbia House was the service. That’s when I ordered my first batch of free music (for a penny). I ordered the music not to listen to, but to get the new CDs, rig them w/ the proper store tags & exchange them at a Wherehouse Music store close to my house (my chivalry was a result of having no money, damn it!). Why in the world would we order music & not listen to it? My friend & I exchanged credits we obtained (we got fully refunded, baby) and rented free video games (mainly Genesis & occasionally rented the Super Nintendo system ($20!) only to play Street Fighter II). I was a nerd, alright. A fucking nerd!

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Zombie Week Coming Up!

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Zombies?

I think those scary people waving around countless flags, holding up Kerry/Edwards (or B/C) posters qualify as zombies. You can give them strap-ons w/ Kerry/Edwards plastered all over them and program into their little chalkboard minds to parade around Boston & I bet they’ll do it. I think they’ll do just about anything if the TV cameras & free food are close by. All they want is to:

1. Scream when told to
2. Clap when told to
3. Tell their friends & family that they support a campaign
4. Get some TV time
5. Have the opportunity to touch very powerful people
6. Feel important

These are the same people who are known as ‘active community members.’ It is bullshit, I tell you. These people are only active because of the amount of energy they expense while clapping, screaming & stomping their feet. The only positive thing I can observe out of all this is that these zombies are expending plenty of calories in the process & thus losing weight (provided they don’t over-indulge in the free food). If you think about it, holding onto a stick w/ a rectangular piece of cardboard attached to one end creates a tremendous amount of resistance as you wave it around (not to mention, works your shoulders)—it’s far better than sitting on the couch w/ a beer in one hand & Cheetos bag in the other.

Here are some Zombies in action!

Crazy People #1
Crazy, I tell you. Why the hell would I want to touch Herman Munster?!

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Lame Duck #2

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Another list of random links…

Is Halle Berry anything like Catwoman in bed? It doesn’t hurt to be hopeful. Read her confessions. [News of the World]

One of the funniest & most insightful columns in the world of business & investing. Meet Alan Abelson. I love reading this guy every Saturday, so I’ll *try* to get a weekly thing going here… [Barrons]

Shane Allison’s ‘Black Flag’ tells this how they really are—no fluff! I think it’s next on my list. [Las Vegas City Life]

More troops killed in July (yes, already) than in all of June. Spread the love, God damn it! [TruthOut]

Get another perspective on what would happen if a terrorist attack were to occur during the elections. [The Palestine Chronicle]

Paris Tosses Nick (Boy #53)

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Random photo of Nick w/ another girl (I got tired of looking at the photo, so I’ve linked to it). Could she be the one?! If she is the one, Nick needs to be pulled aside & beaten silly.

Recently it was reported by a Hilton Hotels publicist that Paris broke up with Nicky Boy!—Or possibly it was the other way around? I think Nicky boy is now broke and needs to go back to touring and making albums to recoup the money he lost while dating Paris. Exact figures of his expenditures are not yet known, but being digged for…We’ve made logical estimates below.

Read the story here. What follows is a brief story book of their relationship & the financial downfall of Nick Carter:

Shopping with Paris
Shopping with Paris Hilton…$3,000,000 (Off topic: Look at the bloody Security guard! He’s got a clear shot of Paris’ Million dollar, boney ass!)

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'We Have Some Planes'

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That is the unfortunate title of Chapter 1 of a lenghty 13 chapter report put out yesterday by the 9/11 Commission. It’s sending chills through my body as I read it, I tell you. The report, which I have yet to read in its entirety, has an amazing amount of information that I’m sure will be priceless in the years to come.

I’ve only started to read Chapters 1, 12 & 13. Why only those chapters?

Well, Chapter 1 is filled w/ all the juicy parts about the unknown. Yes, that is a very horrible thing to say, but it’s my honest reaction when I read it. It is the unknown because I was not up in the airplane and our government has the tendency to conceal all audio & flight data from the public for sake of national security. It’s a subconscious reaction that I’m sure everyone experiences. Right?

Chapter 12 & Chapter 13 are quite possibly the most important chapters in the entire report. Everyone should at least skim through them because it’s the future! They are titled “What To Do?” & “How To Do It?,” respectively. Since terrorism is here to stay for the foreseeable future, it’s very important to read what the most powerful country in the world-the country with the largest army, largest stockpile of nuclear weapons & only God knows what else—is thinking about in terms of fighting terrorism.

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