Countdown to Britney's Divorce #2 Begins

Britney surprises everyone from friends to her own mommy & gets hitched over the weekend. It must have been one of those spontaneous Britney moments. Now that she is at such an illusionary emotional high, it makes me wonder what kind of drugs she will use on her way down. I’m betting on two: coccaine (b/c she’s a socialite) & excessive amounts of food (b/c she’s southern).

Now I will stage a possible conversation that led to the hick-hitchin’ last night:

Atmosphere: [Watching tv, & eatin’ some chicken dumplins & friend turkaay while smokin’ a pack of Marbrolo Lights]

Kevin “no shoelace” Federline: Baby, I love you so much.

Curiously Clueless Britney: Aaaw, you so sweet. I love you too, babes. Hey, pass me a cig, willya?

Kevin: Hey Brit…uh…uh, you know how you said you’d buy me that new Madden NFL 2005 Game Guide after we get married next month?

Britney: Ya honey bunches. What about it?

Kevin: Uh…uhh…well, Barry and I were playing it the other day & he kept beat me b/c he bought the guide last week.

Britney: So, what you sayin’, Sweety?

Kevin: Well, I was thinkin’ we get married tonight & then I can get my guide tomorrow morning? How does that sound, sexy?

Britney: Yaaay! Let’s do it! Weddings are so much fun! Plus, the press will never be expecting it.

Here’s a photo of Britney w/ the touching look of “I just married the man of my of my life” (in a hick sort of way) on her face.

13 comments
Becky Parle
Becky Parle

If they love eachother that is all that counts!!

Kevin seems like anice man, and britney seems like a lovely girl, when they stared in their own reality tv show, britney and kevin chaotic, it loked liked they loved eachother very much so, witch can not b faked from my point of view..

I hope them all the best, and never ending love, And i hope their son sean-preston all the best 4 the future..

Love yas all xx becky xx

Christie

I'll bet she knows she made a mistake marrying this nothing but can't admit it to herself or the public. He has nothing to offer her or himself. What is she trying to prove? Britney screwed up her relationship with Justin Timberlake and wanted to show him she was over him so she married Kevin the Zero. Nice job, Bitch.

choca

She is definitely a whore. How is it that you will sleep with another woman's man with knowing all along the other woman is having his baby. She is going to get exactly what she desrves for being just sneaky. But then again she has money but no esteem. She was desperate to say she have a husband at any cost. It is not love once again it is for the show

darla

She is getting exactly what she deserve/.

A Socialite's Life
A Socialite's Life

Ooops! Britneys Spears Marries Wrong Man For the Second Time

Yep, she's officially an idiot! He's the most brilliant man on the face of the earth! Nine months after a quickie Las Vegas wedding and annulment, the pop tart did it again, getting hitched to her dancer boyfriend, Kevin Federline, Saturday night. S...

Sokha

oh yeah about topic of brit and her divorce hehe sorry i got off track earlier but ...well i dont wanna go at it again..

um britney's marriage wont last long cuz look at the father and his two wedlock kids...he looks like a deadbeat and i seriously thought britney could have done alot better. hey she works hard and she deserves the best. i thougth she and prince william was gonna hook up ^_^ brit has this princess-like appeal to people. she doesnt quite look like one cuz she man look at her! cover up some girl. anyhow i sure hope she knows what she is doing. adn thank goodness her mom made her sign this paper so that if she and her husband ever did divorce she wouldnt have to split her money half and half. Way to go Momma Spears ^_^

Sokha

how can u be sure that she is the one that is cheating on him?? cuz i'm guessing Justin adn his record company had somehting to do w/ this justin and brit break-up. i'm guessing tehy told him to date her, charm her and then when he got someting out of her, make a plot and break up w/ her. yeah they dated back when they were young but dude u dont know this Justin guy! i can see through a person and Justin isnt an all tooo nice of a guy. look what he did to his bandmates 'NSYNC. once he realized that yeah he can make on his own he didnt want to work with the another 4 and split the $$ in 5 equal pays. dat was smart of him but damn! gosh men these days!

Samantha
Samantha

It's funny that Britney chose to remake a Bobby Brown song, 'cause it looks like she's heading in that direction. Brit and Kevin can be the next Bobby and Whitney if they keep at it. Yeah, I'd probably go crazy too if Justin broke up with me. But the moron did it to herself. Cheating on Justin? What are you thinking??

Moe
Moe

The Trousersnake is indeed the man.

He's enjoying the fruits of Cameron Diaz in her womanly prime & after he leaves her (which he will do once he gets bored), I'm betting he's gonna pounce on someone much younger---possibly someone new who we have not heard of just yet. It's possibly he might do a few nights in Paris, but very bleak? Actually, I think Paris is a little too used & abused for a respectable guy like him. He should go for some no-name Ruskie bombshell! Follow the jobs, baby! Go abroad!

Jackson
Jackson

Scarlett Johansson and that voice reading me some Sports Illustrated....that's be a turn on.

have you all seen britney's video for My Prerogative? i was actually intrigued by some scenes of her rolling around in the bed in her underwear...

miSs
miSs

Lovely reinactment Fas. Couldn't have done it any better myself. I imagine that it went down exactly like this. Sigh. God what the hell happened to her. Well, hey ... if I was dumped by one of the hottest guys in the biz I think that I would have the same kind of fate. That down-ward spiral of self-destruction. Falling falling falling until you hit the bottom. What power Mr. Timberlake has! Ha! Thats what you get when you cheat on Justin baby. Justin, I would never cheat on you. I promise.

Anon
Anon

Everybody knows cocaine and excessive amounts of food DON'T go together. (e.g Mary Kate Olsen)

Brian
Brian

This marriage will last about as long as Asslee Simpson's singing career. I don't care what anyone thinks, Britney has completely lost it. She is a dirty whore now. I have transferred all my love to Scarlett Johansson. GOD SHE IS SO HOT!!