MoeJackson

The Keira Defects

For those of you who think I made a mistake & put up a picture of a skinny, 10-year old boy wearing a white, backless dress, you’re madly mistaken. It’s Keira Knightley. Let’s just say that Ms. Knightley should be very thankful for her beautiful face.

I know some of you diehard Keira fans are in pain at the moment, so here’s the full photo that I used for my Gandhi Boobs example.

The use of the bright red lipstick & dark hair is interesting. She/photographers try very hard to take all attention away from her mid-section. The shinny band along her chest area is merely pushing things up trying giving the appearance of boobs.

Keira’s Future

It’s positive, but only if she stays away from box-office nuclear-hydrogen bombs like King Arthur! The movie was painful for those who made it & those poor souls who sat through the 2 hours. It was around $160m to produce/market & has only raked in $51m as of last weekend! Holy Shitness! Keira, Keira, Keira. King Arthur has been made & remade about 40x times since was written.

Think original! Always.

It’s too early in your career to rediscover yourself, ok. Think of the type of movie & type of culture that flung you into stardom. India is the name of the game, baby. I say you go and get your Bs, read about 300 scripts after the dust clears from King Arthur & choose a risky romantic comedy again. I was thinkin’ Adam Sandler. Look @ Drew Barrymore, for God’s sake. Possibly a new age director or producer. Basically go underground for a bit & make sure your next project rocks da house!

Keira, just remember the 2 rules to success in Hollywood:

1. Don’t do movies costing over $50m (includes marketing fees) b/c people tend to lose sense of the movie & think more about how they can money their way into the hearts & mind of the audience. Rarely works.
2. Power is everything. Especially in Hollywood. If you don’t have the power (like yourself), you must be sleeping with power. You go, girl!