Bastardly Analysis: Why Is Usher With Naomi?

Usher
Naomi with some blind man.

Every hot, milk-chocolatey woman with a name & figure is curious as to why Usher is risking his life & reputation with Naomi. I thought about this for about 2 minutes and then it hit me! Usher is a genius, not up to Kevin Federline-genius, but still a genius. He’s sleeping with Naomi not only because he has a fetish for physically abusive sex, but because he wants free access to more beautiful women all around the world.

I like older women. With an older woman there are many things you can learn. [This Is London]

Learn what Ush? Maybe…how to make love to 10 supermodels at the same time?

You must understand that Naomi Campbell is in her early 30s & has been around the fashion industry for a while now. She has her boney fingers wiggling around in every market! We’re talkin’ free access to scandalously wild parties all around the bloody world—from NYC to London to Rome to Japan to Thailand to Australia to the sacred women of the South American continent!! Phew! That’s a lot of women for one man to handle, but apparently Usher is ready for the wildest rollercoaster ride of his life—a ride that has only sex & more sex around ever turn!

But, of course, before Usher can enjoy the sweet fruits of his labor, he must first pass through the Naomi monster!

May God have mercy on him.


17 comments
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Bastardly Analysis: Why Is Usher With Naomi?

BeeGee

killusher, i know you snipers never ever get to shoot a damned thing, but sounds like you're a little too wound up, country boy. Go out back and shoot some rabbits that you can pretend are cornballs like usher. Usher makes me sick too, but I don't wanna put bullets in his brain. Somebody did tell him he was the flyest muthafucka in the Milky Way though. But if you ask me, he's wasting his fame. Naomi Campbell is not good looking. Her feet look like she's been playin footsies with sandpaper and her face has enough makeup on it to ice my daughter's birthday cake. Celebrities never learn that the worst thing you can do is fuck with other celebrities. His dumb ass will learn too.

killusher

Im sorry I dont like to cut on people, but Usher is the most cocky person I have ever seen in my life. He thinks he is perfect lol first of all no one IS!!! I'm a sniper in the Army and I would love to put a bullet in his forehead from about 200 yards away knock some cocky out of him. These celebrities make all this money they are pussies tell them to come over to Iraq 50 cent. Mr. I can whip the world and Im tough and lick my lolly pop and I have the magic stick I will shoot u up to. Screw all u celebs get a life and quit telling us about how great and how tough u r. You could offer any celeb millions of dollars same as they are making now, and they wouldn't go over and fight cause they are pussies scared. lol ha ha h Compton my ass come to Iraq BOY!!!! we will show u more than drive byes lol we will show u bombs

Ben Jennings

usher is the biggest fag I have ever met in my life. I eat tons of fruit to keep this 6 pack you are a fruit Usher. I have a 6 pack and no arms and chest lol. Ha ha u cocky prick. I dont even take a shit I get it sucked out of me cause im to good for my own shit. Yeah I love this guy goo Usher!!!!

treme

Naomi is Naomi... she's always had that reputation.

hahah.. she sported a shirt announcing she hit the chick - that's hysterical!

www.cafepress.com/naomihitme - hahahaha@

Mindy

Meek & humble, whatever! Humble when it applies to not being conceited, okay, I'm with that. Snobby bitchy women deserve a thumbs-down, IMO. However, no woman with any self-respect will allow herself to be simply seen and not heard when it's necessary. We are not doormats.

Now, moving on to Naomi. We all know her story as covered by the media...black British girl becomes international supermodel, battles substance abuse and promiscuity, has severe anxiety and depression, supposedly beats up other women who piss her off. Anyone remember the shirts that said "Naomi Hit Me?" That was a popular slogan in the early to mid-90's, even if most of the wearers of those shirts had never even met Naomi. Lots of women claimed that she slapped them. Personally, I thought Usher & Chilli of TLC were a cute couple but it didn't work out. Sure, Naomi is quite a bit older than he is, but he doesn't seem to have a problem with it. It's not like they're Ashton & Demi or anything.

Usher seems to be into tall model-type women these days. He was seeing this other girl briefly before Naomi. I think her name's Eishia & she's about 6'3", more voluptuous than Naomi. He's a fairly short guy so maybe he likes them tall. Naomi wanted to cuss out Tyra Banks on an interview recently too, because Tyra said something about people being intimidated by Naomi's "strong, harsh" personality.

Sasha
Sasha

Usher looks a lot like Al Reynolds in that pic.

Crystal

I think he should be with Chilli cuz he does not look right with Naomi!He`s just using her to make everyone think that he is so over Chilli.

HumanFreakShow300
HumanFreakShow300

usher is a muthafuckin' faggot. naomi is just a beard (cover-up) for his faggot, bitch-ass.

Moe
Moe

I think we might have another Steve on our hands...

Jackson
Jackson

"Women are suppose to be meek and humble."

hahaha...... i agree with you my bro.

KYLE
KYLE

Hey I dont blame Ush he just probably hitting Naomi till he find the right girl but he makes some bad choices. Naomi is a very rude I sure wouldnt want a woman on my side like that. Women are suppose to be meek and humble. Naomi use to be Hott! She an old Supermodel going slowly down the drain.

mya
mya

I've always heard Naomi was violent and rude, And I know there was something not right about her. I know that everyone would not be saying things like this about her if it werent true and I find this hilarious but Hey whatever Usher wants thats on him. He know he can do much better than Naomi, hey this chick has dated a 54 year old thats should say enough. USHER baby you better stay on your toes for sure, you had better chance with Chilli.

Jackson
Jackson

hahaha.... those are some funny harsh comments towards naomi... i guess she's gone way downhill since the michael jackson video back in the day....in which i thought she was so damn hot!!!!!!

T
T

guys..look closely at naomi's toes if you can get a hi-res pix of that.. it looks gnarled and twisted. yuk!

~S
~S

Naomi has ashy knees.

mary

F Naomi. I want to know what Usher has been doing in Tom Jones's closet.