MoeJackson

Can you believe it?! I think a tear fell when I read that (it probably had something to do w/ the God-awful scan above). I never knew J. Alba whored herself around to every eligible bachelor in Hollywood. She slept around for the sake of ‘experiencing’ sleeping around. Here’s a snip from next month’s Cosmo in which she reveals some scandalous details.

I just wanted to see what it was like to be with different people. I don’t think a girl’s a slut if she enjoys sex. I would have a one-night stand, and I’m not the kind of girl who looks over in the morning and is like, Do you really have to be here? I don’t need to cuddle and do all that stuff because I know what it is and I don’t try to make it more. I feel like a lot of women try to make it into more, so they don’t feel so bad about it just wanting to have sex. I don’t really have a problem with just wanting sex. Never have. Even when I was a virgin and wanted to marry the first guy who I slept with, I never passed any judgments about that. But now I’m done [with dating around]. -Cosmo’s Interview in their March Issue

Damn Jessica for letting self-respect & her conscience convince her to stop sleeping with a new man every other week.

Now she’s dating some dude named CASH! Who names their kid CASH?! Maybe he went to the DMV & changed it himself so he could pick up on hot, rich, superficial broads?

Truly a sad day, I tell you. I didn’t even know that she was a virgin when she was with that Dark Angel co-star, for God’s sake! That bastard got first dibs on one of the hottest pieces of asses in the industry. It’s too bad (for him) that she left his ass.

Anyway, since this is such a tragic day, I’m going to follow up with a photo tribute of Jessica Alba. Hold back your tears, guys.