MoeJackson

Jessica Simpson loves dirty Cak. According to Page Six Jessica Simpson was spotted at Chateau Marmont partying it up with Yucko Dunst and then sneaking away to Adam Levine’s (Lead singer of Maroon 5) room for some of Adam’s dirty Cak. He’s quite the ladies man. The morning after, Jessica was spotted walking the “walk of shame” with Adam’s semen stained shirt on, with the “I just had sex hair”, and having to face the paparazzi. Cacee, her minion assistant, had to pick up Jessica with her gnarly weiner breath the next morning. Poor Cacee, she was once Jessica’s best friend and now she’s been reduced to being the call girls driver. I can’t wait for Jessica to go down in flames once everyone realizes that she is not special and has no talent. Asslee is the ugly one which is why it was easy to uncover her lack of talent; Jessica tends to blind people with her boobs. If things go my way Jessica will end up doing Playboy (I can’t wait for that “spread”), and end up making a sex tape to save her career.