Posts from July 2014

Bernie: Film Review

Ladies, gentlemen, and entertainment blog enthusiasts: we have a winner.

And not just any winner, either. I’m talking a gold medal, blue ribbon, first-in-show county fair winner in Bernie, the deliriously and deliciously fiendish dark comedy starring Jack Black and Shirley MacLaine. This is as good as it’s been at the movies in a good long while, and with the herd of the popcorn blockbusters pawing at the summer movie gate that’s about to be opened, you can bet it’s as good as it’s going to be until Oscar season rolls around in six months. Fans of great cinema, this one’s for you.

Inspired by what we’re told is a real life story, Bernie is about a beloved southerner named Bernie Tiede (Black) who is the “special friend” of an eccentric and bitter old woman named Mrs. Nugent (MacLaine). Their relationship is more than friendship; hell, it’s more than romance: it’s a reciprocal symbiosis of deep, repressed needs.

Nugent, whose wealth is only matched by her loneliness, finds an unlikely savior in the town’s befuddled mortuary artist, Bernie. She apparently hates him at first – not because of anything he says or does, but because she doesn’t know how to access her other emotions.

Unfortunately for her, Bernie knows exactly how to do that, and soon the two are off on lavish trips, expensive dinners, and outings that raise the eyebrows of fellow onlookers. Mrs. Nugent enjoys Bernie’s company – a bit too much, we come to discover – and tries to make him another one of her (shall we say) assets.

Soon, she turns up dead, her apparent murder the subject of an investigation being carried out by district attorney Danny Buck (Matthew McConaughey, mercifully is less than cringe worthy mode). Bernie keeps the body in a freezer for nine months, and when other such lurid details become public knowledge, the townspeople are beside themselves with confusion over how to react. Bernie is, much to their chagrin, still a beloved member of the community, especially its widows. So what if he kills one . . . or two?

The movie can be recommended on the strength of its script alone, which is brilliantly hashed out on screen by Black, MacLaine, and McConaghey. Black plays the part completely straight, sans any affectation, making Bernie one of the most memorable screen creations since Forrest Gump. He may be a small-time funeral parlor director whose only real expertise is in making the dead look “less dead”, but his intentions and ambitions are big-time – as is his ability to make others believe what they think he wants them to believe. It’s a devilish tickle of a good time.

Kate Moss Models for MANGO

Photo Credit: FlameFlynet Pictures

Just when you thought it was safe to go designer shopping again, she’s back! The supermodel with the ‘superest’ lifestyle whose partying skills are matched only by the height of her cheekbones, Kate Moss, is back, posing this time for the brand MANGO. We’re not sure if it’s Photoshop or what (actually, we are sure), but those lines of white residue sure go well with her outfits, wouldn’t you say?

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Charlize Theron, Leslie Mann & Others: CinemaCon 2012 Final Night Talent Awards

Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News

Held at Caesars Palace in Vegas, a long list of A-listers blessed CinemaCon 2012 with their attendance. Judging by the number of people who were holding awards, we’re gonna assume the event organizers freely doled out awards to anybody who accepted their invitation for a fun-filled, full-comped few days in Las Vegas. Life would be so much better if only the rest of us robots got to enjoy similar perks that come with fame & fortune.

Here’s our take on the various attendees, starting first with our longtime favorite, Charlize.

As with most of the events she hits, the beautiful Charlize Theron made all other women feel a lil’ insecure about themselves. She looked absolutely flawless & I gotta admit, I’m really diggin’ that dress! OW! I’m really looking forward to Charlize’s “Snow White & the Huntsman” promotional tour which should kick off any day now. The film hits theaters on June 1.
Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News
As for Leslie Mann: As you connoisseurs of hotness know very well, white women are notorious for being brutally mauled by the infamous Age Monster right when they A) have a kid & B) hit 30, so why is it that 40-year-old Leslie Mann looks the same she did 5 years ago? I don’t know whether to thank her talented makeup artist or her highly paid plastic surgeon?!? It’s L.A., so we always lean toward the latter. Sorry, Lez.

Aside from Charlize & Leslie, here are some of the other ladies in attendance:
Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News
Pictured: Jennifer Garner, Chloe Grace, Michelle Pfeiffer & Anna Farris.

And finally, there were a selection of chic sugar daddies in attendance, as well. I’m shocked CinemaCon bothered to invite Taylor Kitsch, especially when you consider he was the lead in the $200 million mega-shitter, “John Carter.” That film was so bad that Disney had to take a charge of $200 million in their latest quarterly earnings.
Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News
Pictured: Taylor Kitsch, Jeremy Renner, Josh Hutcherson & Diego Boneta

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WeHo: BREAKING!! Amanda Seyfried Picks Up Her Dog Fin From Daycare!

Photo Credit: FameFlynet Pictures

I’m not a big dog guy, but that’s a damn good looking dog! Amanda spent a large part of her day driving around pick up pets, first her boyfriend Josh Harnett’s dog Iggy & then later her own dog Fin (pictured here).

Just like last year, this year is shaping up to be a big year for Amanda Seyfried who has a total of five releases. Unfortunately, from a quality standpoint, things are starting out kinda rough. “Gone,” which released back in February, has a a 11% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, so let’s hope Amanda has better luck with her future releases.

Probably her biggest release this year will be her Linda Lovelace biopic “Lovelace,” which should be in theaters later this year. This definitely sounds like one of those late-year Oscar contenders.

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Michelle Hunziker Golden Bikini Pics From Miami Beach! OW!

Photo Credit: Splash News Online

I gotta admit, after checking out her various bikini-flavored appearances over the years, white & purple are by far my favorites, but Michelle Hunziker is in that unique category of chicks who could wear a stinky trash bag & still manage to look amazing.

These latest photos were snapped earlier today as Michelle was seen lounging with her daughter at the beach in her gold-colored teenie-bikini.

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Jennifer Lopez Rocks Dangerously Short Sequenced Dress on Idol

Photo Credit: FameFlynet Pictures; Pacific Coast News

Watching the performance shows and listening to JLo make such bullshit criticisms makes me really miss Simon Cowell’s far more realistic insights & critiques. It literally sucks that Jennifer Lopez gets millions upon millions to simply look hot in extremely short dresses, while making safe comments & flooding the airwaves with self-promotional bullshit. I guess it’s perfectly alright if people keep eating it all up and wanting more when the season ends! At the end of the day we all know she rose to the top by being smart & opportunistic behind closed doors (i.e. banging the right people). OW!

These were snapped last night as JLo cat-walked over to CBS Studios for the “American Idol” taping.

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Celebrity Leftovers Bring The Morning Links!

Photo Credit: WENN
Pictured: Mia Hope at 12th Annual Beverly Hills Film Festival Premiere of The Black Tulip. Jennifer Morrison and Michelle Krusiec at 2012 Tribeca Film Festival Knife Fight premiere. Cameron Diaz at CinemaCon 2012 “Pioneer of The Year Award” Red Carpet in Las Vegas.

- Miley Cyrus’ Dang Ol’ Gluten Algae Worked Fast [The Superficial]
- Cindy Margolis Looks, Um, Great. [IDontLikeYouInThatWay]
- The 20 Hottest Photos Of Nina Minami [Heavy]
- A-Rod Hasn’t Met A Lot Of Human Beings [Dlisted]
- Maryna Linchuk in Lingerie [GCeleb]
- Candice Swanepoel’s Boring Bikini Photoshoot Pics from Behind of the Day [Drunken Stepfather, NSFW]
- 7 Classic Film Sets That Actually Killed People [Ranker]

- Mila Kunis calls Ashton Kutcher reports absurd but doesn’t really deny them [Lainey Gossip]
- US Weekly: Jennifer Lopez’s marriage to Casper Smart is imminent [Celebitchy]
- Hot Fitness Girls [Caveman Circus]
- Melanie Rios Makes Pants Happy [Diry Rotten Whore, NSFW]
- Homemade Sex Doll [TC Magazine]
- Stacy Keibler Talks Sexy Legs in Men’s Fitness Magazine [Skinny VS Curvy]

- Channing Tatum, Chris Hemsworth & Joe Manganiello Bring Their Brawn & Adriana Lima Brings Her Baby Bump To IWC Flagship Boutique Opening [Socialite Life]
- Maria Venus is From Another Planet [Uncoached]
- 32 Reasons To Celebrate Jordana Brewster’s 32nd Birthday [COED Magazine]
- Six Creepiest Sex Toys (for the Lonliest People on Earth) [Gunaxin]
- 21 Sexy Stacy Keibler Pictures [CityRag]
- Parenting WIN! 22 Awesome Examples Of Kids Doing Cosplay Properly [Ned Hardy]

- Fug the Show: The Client List [Go Fug Yourself]
- Monika Pietrasinska looking drop dead sexy and uber sultry [Brosome]
- Britney Spears’ Fiancé Granted Co-Conservatorship [Celebrity Smack]
- Olivia Wilde’s plump ass [Upskt Celebs]
- Lexi Belle is adorable [Regretful Morning]
- 25 Pictures of Dogs Photobombing [EgoTV]

- The 20 Awesomest Examples of Redneck Engineering [Heavy]
- G-Spot Found In Dead Old Lady! [Holytaco]
- Behati Prinsloo did more work for Victoria’s Secret [Guyism]
- South American Stunner Gabriela Paganini [DJMICK]
- Sexy Photo: India Reynolds [Mankind Unplugged]

- Are you a Bastardly Lady of the Day? [The Bastardly]
$35 FANDANGO GIFT CARDS FOR ALL LEGIT PARTICIPANTS (*if* you get picked)!!

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“Glee” Set: Dianna Agron & Lea Michele Bring The Afternoon Links!

Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News
Snapped yesterday afternoon as Dianna Agron, along with co-stars Lea Michele & Cory Monteith was seen on the set of “Glee,” where they filmed scenes with special guest Lindsay Lohan.

- Kate Upton In Her Pajamas Again [HollywoodTuna]
- Lindsay Lohan Was Late For ‘Glee.’ Of Course. [The Superficial]
- Double outing for the Cambridges [Lainey's Gossip]
- 20 Hottest British Women [Ranker]
- Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon are renewing their vows in Paris: suspicious? [Celebitchy]
- Miley Cyrus Shows Off Her Ridiculously Awesome Legs, Part XXVII [Popoholic]
-
Girls
The 20 Hottest Photos of Natalia Belova [Heavy]
- Amanda Seyfried Seems Excited At The Prospect of Knitting
[IDonLikeYouInThatWay]

- FLASHBACK: Ryan Gosling And Justin Timberlake Singing Jodeci On ‘Mickey Mouse Club’ [VIDEO] [Socialite Life]
- Ke$hit Continues To Document Her Acts Of Severe Classiness [Dlisted]
- Kim Kardashian And Kanye Are Already Talking About Babies [Evil Beet]
- Sara Jean Underwood Strips Down and Gets Sweaty [Complex]
- What Jennifer Aniston Thinks About Brad Pitt & Angelina Jolie’s Engagement [I'm Not Obsessed]
- Rare pictures of Lindsay Lohan [Celebslam]

- Jayde Nicole Upskirt of the Day [Drunken Stepfather, NSFW]
- For Chrissakes, There Is Nothing Wrong With You: A Dating Manifesto [Jezebel]
- This Movie Makes Me Embarrassed to Be an American. God Help Me, I Can’t Wait to See It
[Pajiba]
- Natalie Portman’s Slutty New Look [Celeb Jihad]
- Ask a Babe: Do Chicks Gossip About Guys Skills in Bed, Internet Pick-Ups and a Ginger Can’t Get Laid [BroBible]

- Mischa Barton Was at Brit Week [The Blemish]
- Hunger Games v John CarteR: Budgets & Box office [Lainey's Gossip]
- Cali Logan Picture Moment [HollywoodTuna]
- Khloe Kardashian Kissed Beyonce’s Ass For Kim [The Superficial]
- Miley Cyrus In Skin-Tight Jeans Just Made My Day. Again [Popoholic]

- Vintage Victoria’s Secret Catalog from 1979 [Yeeeah!]
- Sara Jean Underwood Sweaty Hotness [The Grumpiest]
- Blame It All On Hologram Tupac [Dlisted]

- Are you a Bastardly Lady of the Day? [The Bastardly]

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