Monthly Archives: March 2005

Paris Making Out With Paris

Aaaw. Isn’t that sweet? I don’t know who’s filled with more conceit? The male or female version of Paris?

Actually, who gives a shit really. In other news we’re learning that Paris is very fearful of growing old and that is why she will not use drugs.

I don’t like those kind of people (drug users). I’ve seen a lot of bad things happen and I’ve lost a lot of friends, like my friends’ older siblings overdosing in Hollywood.

I’ve seen girls out now who’ve been doing it for so long they look haggard and old. I like my young face. I don’t want to look old. [contactmusic]

So that throws death by overdose out the window, huh? I’m KIDDING!! Anyway, I’m gonna take a wild guess at the person she’s referring to above…Jessica Simpson?! That big-boobied, annoying crackwhore needs to learn to wipe her nose before she leaves club restrooms.

Ok, enough about crack. Let’s see a photo of the two Pariseseses in which Camerawhore Paris looks like male-Paris just had 10 hrs of violent, western sex with her.

Christina Aguilera (Finally) Escapes Planet MILF!

Christina’s Back!

Sheeeee’s baaaaack! Thank the Lord O’ Mighty!

Christina chose a great time to re-debut her old, innocent, Genie in a Bottle look to the superficial world. The photos were taken at a post-Oscars party hosted by the Angry, Annoying Elton John’s AIDS foundation. I wonder if Elton performed one of his annoying songs? It’s a good bet.

So, why did Christina change up the style?! Well, rumor has it, (this is where we get a little creative) that Jordy wouldn’t hand over the rock w/out a signed agreement that Christina would ditch the Marilyn Monroe look and go back to how she looked when the couple first sexed it up. Well, Christina got the rock & Jordy got the old Christina, so to all you people having marital problems, learn how to compromise from these two!

Without further ado, check out the photos below, kiddies.

Where Did Kari Ann Peniche Go?!

Kari Ann

As many of you might remember, Kari Ann Peniche was the chick who defied all rules of the outdated Miss USA Beauty Pageant & went to pose for Playboy (November, 2004). Anyway, with around 20-30mins of fame, Kari then proceeded to disappear into thin air. I think she’s coming out in a movie with bloody Burt Reynolds…good luck with that one!

Well, a couple weeks back some dude caught Kari Ann & her chick-posse getting plastered at some bar in LA. I guess some guys have all the fun. Damn them.

Check out a few of the scandalous photos below.

Can't Get Enough Jackie!!!!!!!

Okay, so I’ve re-arranged my morning routine to where I wake up for Despierta America and Jackie’s weather report at 7:10 am….so now I come into work about 20 minutes later than I usually would…but who cares, the 2 mintues that she’s on tv helps me get energized for the day ahead of Corporate America ass-raping.

Enjoy!

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