Monthly Archives: March 2005

Paris Making Out With Paris

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Aaaw. Isn’t that sweet? I don’t know who’s filled with more conceit? The male or female version of Paris?

Actually, who gives a shit really. In other news we’re learning that Paris is very fearful of growing old and that is why she will not use drugs.

I don’t like those kind of people (drug users). I’ve seen a lot of bad things happen and I’ve lost a lot of friends, like my friends’ older siblings overdosing in Hollywood.

I’ve seen girls out now who’ve been doing it for so long they look haggard and old. I like my young face. I don’t want to look old. [contactmusic]

So that throws death by overdose out the window, huh? I’m KIDDING!! Anyway, I’m gonna take a wild guess at the person she’s referring to above…Jessica Simpson?! That big-boobied, annoying crackwhore needs to learn to wipe her nose before she leaves club restrooms.

Ok, enough about crack. Let’s see a photo of the two Pariseseses in which Camerawhore Paris looks like male-Paris just had 10 hrs of violent, western sex with her.

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Christina Aguilera (Finally) Escapes Planet MILF!

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Christina’s Back!

Sheeeee’s baaaaack! Thank the Lord O’ Mighty!

Christina chose a great time to re-debut her old, innocent, Genie in a Bottle look to the superficial world. The photos were taken at a post-Oscars party hosted by the Angry, Annoying Elton John’s AIDS foundation. I wonder if Elton performed one of his annoying songs? It’s a good bet.

So, why did Christina change up the style?! Well, rumor has it, (this is where we get a little creative) that Jordy wouldn’t hand over the rock w/out a signed agreement that Christina would ditch the Marilyn Monroe look and go back to how she looked when the couple first sexed it up. Well, Christina got the rock & Jordy got the old Christina, so to all you people having marital problems, learn how to compromise from these two!

Without further ado, check out the photos below, kiddies.

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Where Did Kari Ann Peniche Go?!

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Kari Ann

As many of you might remember, Kari Ann Peniche was the chick who defied all rules of the outdated Miss USA Beauty Pageant & went to pose for Playboy (November, 2004). Anyway, with around 20-30mins of fame, Kari then proceeded to disappear into thin air. I think she’s coming out in a movie with bloody Burt Reynolds…good luck with that one!

Well, a couple weeks back some dude caught Kari Ann & her chick-posse getting plastered at some bar in LA. I guess some guys have all the fun. Damn them.

Check out a few of the scandalous photos below.

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Can't Get Enough Jackie!!!!!!!

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Okay, so I’ve re-arranged my morning routine to where I wake up for Despierta America and Jackie’s weather report at 7:10 am….so now I come into work about 20 minutes later than I usually would…but who cares, the 2 mintues that she’s on tv helps me get energized for the day ahead of Corporate America ass-raping.

Enjoy!

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